


give me something to believe in.

by sundazed (adorabias)



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: Denial of Feelings, Future Fic, M/M, Post-Graduation, You're Welcome, and therefore significantly less shota (except for like tori bc that's his selling point), the first-years are now third-years, this became a pwp: plot with porn ig
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-01
Updated: 2016-10-01
Packaged: 2018-08-18 18:51:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 20,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8172181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adorabias/pseuds/sundazed
Summary: Post-graduation. The saying goes: if you love someone, let them go. Luckily, this does not apply to Tsukasa. He most certainly does not love Leo Tsukinaga. Unfortunately he also can't seem to let him go - though not for lack of trying, mind you.in which Tsukasa realizes that the truth of the matter is that all third-years make bad life choices and now it's his turn, Hajime and Tori are too put upon as friends, the rest of Knights have front row seats to a romantic dramedy, and Leo pulls a disappearing act - but only for so long.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [safome](https://archiveofourown.org/users/safome/gifts).



> so my friend dared me a month ago to write something and the prompt I got was "lewd" and i ended up building an entire storyline out of it. that's how we got here.
> 
> actual notes: if Tsukasa says something in italics, it's Probably in English
> 
> and this is dedicated to kosy, my bae, because she's impossible and perfect and my fav

“Your destination is coming up, Young Master Tsukasa.”

Violet eyes glanced up, making contact with the limousine driver’s through the use of the rear view mirror. A delicate raise of an eyebrow. “Am I truly still a ‘Young Master’?”

“You’ll always be young in my eyes, sir,” the driver hummed, comfortable after three years in Tsukasa’s service – for which Tsukasa was grateful and irritated by all at once.

A soft sigh escaped him – not too much, not too ungrateful or too uncouth – and inspired a brief laugh from his companion.

“Hajime.” Tsukasa turned to the other, just barely schooling his expression out of a pout. “What exactly is so funny?”

“Mm, nothing, I didn’t mean any offense, Tsukasa,” Hajime chirped, delicately bringing up a hand to obscure his smile. “I just think it’s nice how familiar you are with your chauffer… It’s very sweet. It shows that you’ve grown up very well?”

“Well, I would hope so,” Tsukasa agreed, hand coming up to brush his bangs to the side. Then he turned to his friend, corners of his mouth turning up into a sparkling smile, a devilish flash in his eyes. He reached out, fingers curling gently around a lock of Hajime’s hair, grown out more and more over the years, though he was still mindful to tie it into a loose ponytail. The space between them closed as Tsukasa leaned in, humming, “I think we have both grown up well?”

A surprised, bashful laugh bubbled up from Hajime then, his eyes widening in a mixture of confusion and delight. “Tsu-Tsukasa…?! Why are you suddenly playing your king routine? Stop the fanservice…!”

To which Tsukasa laughed, childish and spoiled, leaning back to his place in the limo so that the seatbelt didn’t dig into his shoulder. “If you tease others, prepare to get teased, Hajime?” He chuckled turning his gaze back to the window. “Ah – though I suppose that was a bit more for my own fun.”

Could anyone really blame Tsukasa for enjoying getting a rise out of his dear destined rival every now and then?

(Though it was not like Hajime ever fought back. He was often too good to Tsukasa that way.)

Hajime breathed a noise between a sigh and a laugh. “Truly, the leaders of Knights are always so eccentric…”

Tsukasa glanced back at that, though only momentarily before turning back to the city streets they navigated through. On this night, the lights seemed brighter than usual, like they were heralding them to where they were meant to be.

“Mm, maybe,” he offered noncommittally. “But comparing me to them is still pretty mean, Hajime…”

Ritsu was a hilarious King in his own right – terribly strategic in all things even though he also hated to lift a finger. But what was efficiency besides genius laziness, anyway? Not to mention the other—

Yes, that’s right. Not to mention him at all.

“Ah? That’s not what I intended,” Hajime immediately began to apologize even as he fixed his ponytail, tilting his head. But he was cut off by the sight of Tsukasa looking at him from the corner of his eye, the curve of a small smile already peeking. The songbird of Ra*bits paused, pinned under the gaze of the Yumenosaki’s King.

Even though Tsukasa was looking right at him, there was something in his eyes that said that his thoughts were somewhere else entirely.

“I know, my dear friend, I know."

The city continued to pass through their windows, bringing them closer and closer to their destination.

Tsukasa’s driver glanced back to them from the rear view mirror, watching the exchange between his young master and the one that he called his rival, and laughed softly to himself.

Truly, his master was still so very young.

 

* * *

 

_before._

It had surprised everyone that Leo was still in contact during Arashi and Ritsu’s third year. Even though he had graduated and began to attend college, he would still respond to their old Knights group chat, even as new members joined and forced another one to be made.

There was always Leo in the background.

There was Leo in the songs that they sang because even though he had left, he maintained that some part of his heart would always be able to write for Knights. There was Leo in the practice room, sudden interruptions whenever college set him free for break where everything spiraled into chaos and laughter. There was Leo in the audience, evaluating and encouraging all at once, endless.

Present.

There was Leo at Arashi and Ritsu’s graduation ceremony, cackling at their emotional tears and welcoming them to the working world, were they ready for it?! Even then, he’d smiled as if he’d never been broken at all. His Knights were flourishing, he’d said, and that was all he could ever ask.

Doting.

There was Leo in their lives even after he’d graduated, just constant enough to not be overwhelming but never allowing himself to be missed either.

“This is my home? Mm, what’s in a home anyway – a place, a person, a thing?! – but I know that this is where I want to be. So what’s wrong with it?” he’d said to Tsukasa one rainy day in the practice room.

There was Leo.

Until – there wasn’t.

A new school year brought new faces, new challenges, and new chances for dreams and disasters alike.

A new school year – Tsukasa’s final year, to be specific – erased Leo.

Answers were nowhere to be found, of course. At the very least, his family wasn’t concerned – Leo had a habit of wandering off and while Ruka was gently worried, she knew that her brother loved them all too much to be gone for too long. Did no one care that he had a car now and could get much, much farther?

But it’s not like anyone ever listened to Tsukasa about that.

There was Leo.

(There was Leo burned into the back of Tsukasa’s eyelids. There was Leo humming in Tsukasa’s ears. There was Leo shamelessly encouraging, ‘I love you! Make me proud!’)

Until there wasn’t.

Until there was only a stack of half-finished songs left on a grand piano, barely workable into new melodies and harmonies.

Until there was only Tsukasa standing alone, heart in hand. Just barely beating. 

 

* * *

 

As they began to round out the end of their third year, it only seemed natural for the veteran idols of Yumenosaki Academy to start getting invited to proper idol events – in this case, an awards banquet.

“Ready?” Tsukasa fixed his collar one last time, straightened his suit to crisp perfection, glancing over his shoulder at Hajime.

“I never feel ready for these things… but I suppose so!” Hajime laughed bashfully, still ever the picture of purity and sweetness, somehow managing to escape the unbearable gossip and blinding stardom of their profession.

With that, the door to their limousine was opened by the chauffer. They were bathed in lights, attention, questions – “Are you ready to graduate?” and “Are you anticipating a win tonight?” and “Even though you’re in different units, you support each other?” – and answered with pristine, perfect smiles.

Tsukasa Suou – heir to the Suou family, real life Prince Charming, the leader of veteran unit Knights – laughed gently at a reporter’s joke. “Ever since my first year, Knights has been composed of highly individual members? Though I hold them in the highest regard, the other members of my unit told me very firmly that they weren’t interested in coming with me tonight. Perhaps that means I will get to relax?”

Between reporters, he fiddled with the cuffs of his suit jacket. The call of fans distracted him, made him turn in their direction and pause to offer a wave and a smile. “How princely!” they swooned.

Still so cute.

“While I’d be really honored to receive an award tonight, I’m actually super happy that I was even thought of to be invited!” Hajime Shino – eldest child of the Shino family, actual cinnamon roll, strongest vocalist of unit Ra*bits – fussed with the end of his ponytail as he answered questions. Though his statement was likely to be repeated by many celebrities tonight, none would be as genuine about it as the bashful and sweet Hajime.

Tsukasa hummed.

It was absolutely criminal how Hajime was even cuter than the fans.

It made him chuckle softly to himself, a soft smile that he knew for a fact looked good on camera, and faced the crowd with a revitalized spirit.

Certainly, he had no interest in losing this competition of charm – even though it was unclear if Hajime even realized that he’d thrown the gauntlet down.

Though it’s not like their types of charm could be compared. While Hajime was soft, sweet as honey, and had only gotten softer and sweeter as the years had gone on, Tsukasa had not.

Taller now after three years, Tsukasa walked down the red carpet with a poise that could only be described as Royal. Confidence amplified, it was nearly a strut as he smiled and held poses without missing a beat. Three years had turned him into a rightful King.

“Ou-samaaaa!” girls screamed from the crowd. Tsukasa looked away from the camera flashes in that direction, offering an obliging smile.

“Hello—”

“Mm? Ou-sama? Oh, that’s familiar! I haven’t heard that in years, wahahaha! ☆”

Three years had turned Tsukasa into a rightful King.

A few sentences uttered in but a number of seconds was all it took to turn him into a Rook all over again.

Immediately, his head turned toward the source of the voice. Ahead of him? There was no one interviewing ahead of him, he’d thought. There was no one dealing with the wave after wave of reporters. And if it was him, if it was _him_ , Tsukasa would’ve known. Would’ve felt it in his bones, would’ve disregarded every single reporter no matter the bad publicity—

Yet there Leo stood at the end of the red carpet. A notebook tucked under his arm and a shameless, curious grin on his face as he looked back to the girls who had screamed that fateful title.

Then his eyes found Tsukasa.

“Huh?”

Tsukasa, dressed finely in a three-piece suit, too thrown off-guard to think to school his expression into something neutral or pleasant for the cameras. No, instead he was sure that the shock registered on his face.

The crowd and paparazzi began to talk.

“Hey, isn’t that—”

“Tsukinaga Leo? Wasn’t he also an ‘Ou-sama’ for Knights? And that’s Suou Tsukasa, the current one…”

“Wait, Tsukinaga? Haven’t heard that name in a while.”

“Look at Suou, he’s gone pale! A proper deer in the headlights!”

 “You think there’s something there?”

In the world of fame and music, people were wont to talk. They were wont to talk for you, around you, and about you. By now, Tsukasa knew that.

There were also a few other things that Tsukasa knew:

The cameras were flashing. This would surely end up in a magazine by morning. Hajime had finished his interview and was peering over, wondering why Tsukasa had stopped so suddenly. The fans were still screaming for his attention – or was it Leo’s attention? Regardless, the screams fell on deaf ears.

For that set of agonizingly long seconds, they saw only each other.

Suspended in that moment, they locked gazes.

‘I didn’t expect to see you here,’ they said.

 

* * *

 

_before._

“So? How was it?”

“Ugh, you couldn’t wait until you showered to come see us? Really, you’re too overeager for praise, don’t you think?”

“I’m glad you’re the same as always, Sena-senpai – but if it’s praise, does that mean it was a good show?”

Tsukasa laughed gently as Arashi handed him a towel, as Izumi gave him an appraisal and a smirk that already said ‘You know damn well that it was a good show, you little shit.’

Of course it had to be a good show. It was his first Dreamfes where he acted as King.

The rest of the former members of Knights had gathered backstage, ready to walk Tsukasa back to his dressing room. They’d waited patiently for him even though they didn’t have to, hung around as Tsukasa had given a proper leader-like, encouraging speech to the current members. Even now they were his beloved guiding upperclassmen - they were there for him as always.

… well, three of them were.

Tsukasa brought the towel up to his lips, as if that would muffle his loneliness.

“Not bad, Suu-chan, I guess I don’t have to feel bad about you taking up the mantle?” Ritsu hummed, throwing an arm around Tsukasa – something that Tsukasa would’ve minded normally, but it was his first time seeing Ritsu in a few weeks. With that in mind, perhaps it was excusable to let him hang around.

“Why would we be worried about something like that?” Arashi laughed. “Tsukasa-chan’s been hard-working even since his first year. And now he’s grown up into a hard-working young man. We’ve raised him so well…”

Tsukasa shook his head faintly. Well. It’s not like he would be the same person if he hadn’t had the rest of Knights so perhaps that’s fair to say.

Perhaps if he basked in their praise, the attention of the alumni that he knew loved him, he would forget easily about the one who had gone missing.

(The one who Tsukasa waited for the most.)

“Oh! S-Suou-sama…!"

Their little group paused in their walk. Tsukasa turned, expecting to see a member of his family’s staff.

Instead, it was a fan. While it briefly crossed his mind to wonder if he’d been followed – some fans would just be very… ah, determined? – she looked just as surprised as he did. In the span of a second, Tsukasa had gently shrugged off Ritsu’s arm around his shoulders, had taken the towel in hand and handed it back to Arashi as he stepped forward with a pristine smile.

(“I’m your older sister, not your mother?” Arashi pouted.

“He changes back to his stage persona almost as quickly as Secchan,” Ritsu noted, shuffling to lean against the other two instead.

“I wouldn’t endure the trouble of shifting for _this_.”

Arashi frowned.

“That’s a person, Izumi-chan?”)

“You called for me, _my lady?_ ” Tsukasa offered, hand already hovering over his chest like a proper knight. Fanservice had always been a specialty of Knights – though in Tsukasa’s case, it was effortless. Treating young ladies well was merely a way of the Suou, after all.

“I… I just wanted to say,” the poor thing gasped, stuttered, stared up at him with wide eyes. “Th-This was my first visit to Yumenosaki Academy a-and seeing Knights was… was amazing! It changed my life! Th-Th-Thank you!”

(“Oh no, she’s so _cute_ ,” Arashi whined.)

Violet eyes warmed as Tsukasa took in the compliment, the genuine sentiment reaching him. He offered a hand out to her.

Confused but bold – she was so sweet, so _so_ sweet – she placed her hand in his despite its shaking.

Then, cradling her hand between both of his, as if it was some kind of treasure or token, Tsukasa gave her a reassuring squeeze. “It warms my heart that you would say so. Thank you for giving us the honor of your attention and praise.”

Blush lighting up her face, the girl looked at Tsukasa like he’d walked right out of a fairytale. “You’re really dreamy as they say, Suou-sama…” she had apparently passed the nervous wreck phase and had gone straight into star struck. “Like… Like maybe even just an Ou-sama…!”

“Why are they never creative with titles?” Izumi put a hand on his hip, raising a brow.

“You can only get so far with chess pieces, Secchan?”

“Still though,” Arashi tittered, “it’s not like the nickname worked properly with Ritsu-chan so we didn’t have an Ou-sama last year. So isn’t this just like—”

“Enough,” Tsukasa sighed, turning back to them, rejoining their little peanut gallery after he’d sent the girl off. He took his towel back from Arashi, set it around his shoulders again with enough care that it almost looked more like a cloak. “It’s not like I could tell her that we’ve already had an Ou-sama. The goal isn’t to embarrass her?”

“Don't see why not.” Izumi shrugged.

Arashi sighed. “You’re awful.”

“They’re not going to remember our last Ou-sama anyway, if they’re new fans,” Ritsu pointed out, yawning.

Tsukasa looked away.

It’s not like there was anyone left to remember anyway.

“Ah, but she’s right. That was a good show, King, I wouldn’t be surprised if more fans managed to come in in droves,” Arashi hummed, eyes bright with amusement and fondness.

“You’ve been waiting for this since your first year, right?” Izumi smirked, crossing his arms and tilting his head in challenge. “Like I said, you better not mess up what we’ve left for you.”

Even Ritsu laughed, setting his hands on his hips as he faced Tsukasa. “You come from a long line, Suuchan… We all expect you to surpass even the Mad King and the Vampire King, you know?”

So it was official.

The seal of approval from his alumni was the last piece needed for Tsukasa’s coronation.

Now the kingdom was truly his.

There had only been one other time that all three of them had looked at him like this, had stood around Tsukasa as if awaiting his true arrival. In the wings of a stage prepared by the former Emperor, wearing the costumes sewn by an amateur producer, ready to face down their renegade leader.

Tsukasa had been the King during that Duel – had been their hope, their future, their wildcard.

But that had been handed to him. It was a matter of circumstance and strategy. Here, now, in his third-year, he had finally earned it. _This_ crown came from his slow yet rightful ascendance to the throne.

Tsukasa could only offer a smile to the alumni, all charm and roses. “Don’t worry, I have no intention on disappointing.”

The three of them – and only three – watched him with approval.

He bit his tongue to keep from saying that he thinks the Mad King had given them enough disappointment for a few lifetimes.

Even now, leaving Tsukasa’s heart sinking and sinking as he realized that Leo really was nowhere to be found.

Even on his coronation day.

  

* * *

 

Leo won an award that night.

(Okay, well, Composition Fiend X did – but at least Leo was apparently making some sort of vague, lazy effort to switch out his alias for his real name. Sometimes.)

Hajime put a hand on Tsukasa’s forearm, his own gaze cautious. Tsukasa turned to him and smiled gently.

Tori, who had been driven in his own car and joined them only at the tables, watched with an obvious, piercing gaze before looking back to the stage.

Their alumnus was being honored.

“Mm, they’re making me speak?” Leo asked as he was pushed up to the microphone, blinking as if he’d never been to an award ceremony before. As if he wasn’t among the youngest composers to be able to consistently put out hit after hit, even after a year of apparent absence.

But Leo didn’t talk about that.

Instead as he stood up there, he flicked his ponytail over his shoulder and adjusted his bangs. A moment in the spotlight was all it took to ignite him, make his grin delighted and just a hint crazed.

“Thank you for this! Even though I don’t know what I’ll do with it – maybe it’ll be an effective paperweight so the inspiration doesn’t fly away, ahaha! – I will say that I am happy to produce the music that I do. You know, even if I don’t know where I am or who I am, the music is with me? Inspiration strikes anywhere – everywhere! And so I’m lucky that I’m able to make it. Mm, it’s been harder lately so I guess I earned this based on past work?”

There was a pause, a moment where Leo seemed to remember something suddenly. His eyes squinted into the light. People wondered if he was done with his speech. Yet he turned his head, continued to scan the crowd until –

His eyes fell on Tsukasa.

The mad smile returned. He lifted his award.

“This isn’t just for me! It tells our story, you know?”

And just like that, he laughed, bowed, and left the stage in a hurricane of motion. It was a ridiculous speech. Hard to follow, totally incomprehensible – it really might’ve just been a rant.

Yet Tsukasa sat in his seat, his eyes still trained on the podium that Leo had just occupied, his hand coming to rest over his furiously beating heart.

‘There’s no story to tell,’ he told himself. ‘We have no story to tell.’

Lying would be much easier than admitting that something as stupid and ridiculous as that mess of a speech was enough to make him remember he was in love. 

 

* * *

 

_before._

Heart pounding in his chest, Tsukasa didn’t take the time to think.

He raised the young lady’s hand to his lips, pressing a brief yet sweet kiss on the back of it.

A cute, endearing little squeak escaped the owner of the hand. Ruka Tsukinaga, eyes bright and face alit with embarrassment, looked up at him in some parts wonder, some parts awe, and some parts confusion.

Unable to help himself, he winked back.

… it was part of a performance, mind you.

Well, mostly.

This part wasn’t scripted but Tsukasa didn’t think that mattered – the roar of the crowd was a deafening show of appreciation and the rush of a blush across Ruka’s cheek was beautiful. For the sake of fan service and showmanship, his family understood the bending of their rules.

Overall? Worth it.

Still, he supposed this confirmed Leo’s disappearance.

After all, if he was watching, he most certainly would’ve descended from the skies to kick Tsukasa right in the face.

Tsukasa let a thought cross his mind.

Maybe Leo was dead?

What other excuse would he have for missing the first collaboration live between his old, beloved unit and the unit of his darling little sister?

But he supposed that he couldn’t linger on that too long.

The timing demanded their bows and so he turned, Ruka’s hand still in his, crossing his free arm over his chest and providing a gentlemanly bow. That was his part. Next to him, she curtsied to match.

With a laugh, endeared and kind, he looked over to her. It was too loud everywhere for them to exchange words but—

He thought that he found words in her gaze.

‘Thank you, Tsukasa.’

Getting lost in the familiar green of her eyes, he only hoped that she wasn’t able to read his gaze nearly as well.

There was a danger that it was saying stupid like—

‘I wish that you were the one I’m looking for.’

 

* * *

 

“Don’t wait up,” Tsukasa turned away from his companions as they stepped foot into their hotel. The reception desk was to the left, the elevators towards rooms to the right.

Only Hajime’s hand gave him pause as it wrapped gently around Tsukasa’s forearm before he could go too far.

Hajime’s eyes glanced toward the directing signs, realizing where Tsukasa was headed before he even opened his mouth.

The heir only wondered when he became so obvious.

“He’s your King, right?” Tsukasa’s sharp look got Hajime to stumble. “W-Was your King, I mean… I’m sure he’ll be glad to see you, but… please be careful? To chase after someone who won’t wait for you is…”

“Stop trying to talk sense into him?” Tori huffed, hands on his hips. “Tsukasa’s always been annoying but something about this guy has made him crazy for years. If he’s going to be an idiot, let him be an idiot.”

A huff of a laugh escaped Tsukasa as he turned to Tori, violet eyes sharp. “For once, we agree.”

Far more gently, he turned to Hajime, taking the other’s hand in between both of his own. “It’s not that I think that this is a smart decision… but I need to go make it anyway.”

Hajime looked up at him with mild concern, brow furrowed before smoothing out his expression. A shake of his head and he was once again as beautiful as a painting, serene and encouraging. “Okay. You know where to find us.”

“I know it’s going to be hard for you but don’t do anything too stupid?” Tori frowned.

Tsukasa freed Hajime’s hands in time to obscure his smile behind raising his hand to his lips.

The Emperor and King were always destined to be in opposition – that had been evident since the days of Eichi and Leo – but Tori and Tsukasa managed to bring something personal to it.

Including the way that Tori seemed to soften up at the oddest moments.

“Thank you for caring, Tori, Hajime,” Tsukasa sighed.

(Tori’s screeches in denial as Tsukasa turned his back and walked away made it entirely worth it.)

Those two would wait for him, he knew. Hopefully not wait _up_ for him, considering the already late hour, but he wasn’t certain about that.

However he could not spare the time to think any further on the matter, would not be able to live with himself if he didn’t just keep moving, letting his long legs carry him to the reception desk.

His king had been spotted.

Once, he had jokingly(?) told Yuzuru that when it came to Leo, he would stop at nothing. If necessary, it would become a _Search and Destroy_ type of affair.

And that was when they were on fairly good terms.

Now, infuriating speeches and a year without speaking thrown into the mix, Tsukasa couldn’t help but thinking that the idea of leaving Leo in ruins sounded better and better.

 

* * *

 

_before._

Incognito was always such a burden.

It was never a problem in the city surrounding Yumenosaki, everyone accustomed to seeing their aspiring idols walking the streets and indulging in the pleasures of life.

Big spots like Tokyo or Kyoto or Shibuya were different stories – while there were certainly enough people that one could blend into the crowd, it was never worth it to deal with droves of fans stopping you from conducting your business.

Considering that Tsukasa was here to visit Anzu, who had a two-hour break from work today, he had no desire whatsoever to be stalled from it.

Adjusting his sunglasses, he waited for her by a small ice cream parlor.

“What are you saying, onee-sama?” Tsukasa sighed into the phone, receiving brief updates on her location as she approached. “You worked very hard at your composing, I think that it’s _marvelous_. I hate to hear you put yourself down like that.”

Again, she said something humble. Tsukasa smiled gently even as he watched the groups of people go by.

He pretended that his eyes did not snap to every person with a shock of orange hair.

“You know that Knights would not be flourishing this year without you… Even after you have graduated, you are still helping me,” he hummed, warmth blooming in his chest as he recalled how his darling sister would dote on him.

What would he do without her?

Anzu was kind, sweet, and hard-working – everything that he admired and adored. Even as he thought of her as a sister, he also did not disagree when others said that she would make for a fine bride.

After all, she also possessed quite the sharp tongue when necessary.

“… Why are you bringing up his name, onee-sama?” Tsukasa frowned, his eyes darting the crowd to look for her. “He has been gone for months again, already. He is not coming back this time.”

Eventually, Tsukasa’s gazed locked with a familiar set of eyes in the crowd. Anzu found him, strode forward like a queen, and Tsukasa’s heart practically fell at her feet.

A pout curled her lips into something unhappy as she chastised him.

“I know that the only reason he came back last time is because of me…” Tsukasa tried the words, hesitantly. Embarrassedly. It’s not as if he got Leo to _stay_ , after all. “But it is not fair to expect me to chase a second time if these are the results. I cannot trouble you and the others to look for him as well – and besides, he has graduated. There is nothing to tether him to here anymore.”

Anzu took initiative then, taking Tsukasa’s hand into hers, surprising his heart into skipping a beat.

“ _I’m_ here…?” Tsukasa flustered, fumbled, and paused as he parroted her words dumbly. He cleared his throat gently, tried to recover. How did Anzu always manage to do this to him?

She nodded firmly.

“I… I am,” he eventually found his voice again. “But I don’t know if that means anything to him anyway… Why should I chase after him after I have already done so before? When all I have left to offer is myself—ah?!”

Renewed with a sense of courage that came with being in the entertainment world for a year, Anzu pulled on Tsukasa’s cheek, surprising him.

When she released his face to allow him to speak again, he flustered, “Onee-sama…. that was embarrassing…” His free hand came up to rest against his cheek. “Can we please stop talking about this? I do not get nearly enough time with you anymore? If possible, I would like to stop talking about him. Please dote on your little brother while he is here…”

Anzu looked dubious for a moment, then a short exasperated sigh left her lips. With a nod, she properly took Tsukasa’s hand in hers to hold and headed to face the ice cream shop.

‘… he’s waiting for me? And I’ve always been enough?’ Tsukasa turned Anzu’s words over in his head even as he stared up at the ice cream menu.

The notion settled in the back of his mind even as the cashier mistook he and Anzu for a couple, Tsukasa’s mouth curling into a smug smile when his favorite producer turned beet red.

It stuck with him even on the train back home. Anzu was certain that Leo was waiting for Tsukasa – that Tsukasa could succeed in being the one to bring him back again, maybe for good, even though it was unclear why Leo had even run away in the first place.

It was a very troublesome thing, for Leo to be away somewhere and just moving around idly like a vagabond until Tsukasa would appear to collect him and take him home.

And yet—

Tsukasa couldn’t say that it was an impossible notion either.

Something so selfish, so demanding, and yet so ironically patient… Didn’t that still manage to sound like Leo?

 

* * *

 

“Suou Tsukasa?”

Tsukasa paused, snapped out of his reverie as he heard his name leave the receptionist’s lips.

“It’s against our policy to give information on our guests, sir. Might I ask your relationship with him?”

It would appear that he had been beaten to it.

“He’s one of my Knights! I’m his king!” Leo proudly declared without hesitation – and Tsukasa felt embarrassed _for_ him – before appearing to pause. “Or, well—”

“You are not my King.”

Tsukasa stepped forward, watching as Leo whipped around. Truly, he wouldn’t stop wearing his heart on his sleeve, would he? His eyes wide in shock, back pressed against the receptionist’s desk as if he’d been cornered. Caught.

‘Well,’ Tsukasa thought, ‘that’s not entirely wrong.’

“You appeared out of thin air?! Were you summoned…?! How long have I had this power?” Leo gasped. More like babbled, really.

Tsukasa didn’t answer that – wouldn’t give Leo the satisfaction of knowing that if he had but uttered a location, given even a clue, Tsukasa would have come running – and instead looked back to the receptionist, giving her a patient smile. “I’ll take it from here, thank you.”

“Yes, Ou-sama,” she chirped happily.

(She was a fan, but that’s neither here nor there.)

“Ou-sama…” Leo hummed thoughtfully. It was that title that had managed to get these rusty old gears to turn, had opened this door so suddenly that Tsukasa almost wasn’t prepared, but he still wouldn’t let the chance slip from him. “From… Su…ou? I see, I see. I didn’t think they would repeat so soon…!”

The words were harmless, but Leo’s movements were not. His steps began to close the space between himself and Tsukasa, strides all contained power and awareness of the fact that somehow, sometimes, the world moved to accommodate him. A confidence that he wore like a cloak.

Bright green eyes flashed up at Tsukasa.

“Anyway, I’ve been looking for you!”

Tsukasa paused, letting the words sink in. The sentiment came from Leo as opposed to himself, so suddenly and honestly. And he knew – he knew it was foolish, since Leo was obviously only talking about the 10 or so minutes since the ceremony had ended that he’d been looking for Tsukasa. Not the year that Tsukasa had spent wondering where his leader had gone, why he waited for Arashi and Ritsu and Izumi but never him. Those two things didn’t even compare.

But—

Tsukasa had thought he would be enraged when he saw Leo again. There were theories about what he would feel. Anger, distress, betrayal.

Leo was looking up at him, was so open and hopeful and everything that Tsukasa remembered about his maddeningly brilliant and sometimes just maddening lord.

Rather than mocking him or running, Leo had been looking for him, found him, and was now giving him a smile that made Tsukasa weak.

The burning hot rage left Tsukasa’s veins, the fight seeping out of him as his own thoughts left him stunned.

‘I missed you,’ he realized, the ache of it hitting him stronger than anything else. ‘I missed you so much.’

 

* * *

 

_before._

“You could’ve just called.”

Tsukasa squinted before rubbing his eyes, as if that would manage to make the current image of Leo, being held and detained by the Suou family security go away. But no, the situation remained the same.

It was about midnight when he’d heard the disruption, had to pretend that he wasn’t getting a snack out of the fridge, and went to see about the matter of an intruder himself when he’d heard the description ‘wild young man saying something about aliens’.

He was in denial up until this point.

“You know him, Young Master?” the security guard who held Leo asked, slowly loosening his hold on him.

“Unfortunately,” Tsukasa frowned before waving a hand. “Thank you for doing an excellent job, please return to your posts. I apologize that he caused you trouble like this but I’ll be able to handle it from here.”

The other guard frowned, looking between Leo and Tsukasa before warning, “Careful, Young Master. I fear that your friend is feverish – he almost sounds deranged.”

“That’s him on a good day,” Tsukasa sighed.

“Tsuuu!” Leo wailed, rushing toward the other as soon as he was freed, throwing his arms around the younger boy. A bit ridiculous even then – just a year had already put Tsukasa an inch or two above Leo.

Yet the security paused, ready to peel this strange young man off their charge before Tsukasa waved a hand in dismissal once again. Really, this was fine.

Sort of.

He pushed Leo off with his own power, huffing and pretending valiantly that there wasn’t a blush creeping up on his cheeks. “You’re making a scene? Quit that, Leader! Don’t disrupt the manor in the middle of the night? It’s such a _nuisance!_ ”

“Wahahaha, the spoiled little noble makes an appearance?! I wasn’t ready!” Leo cackled, as if he hadn’t heard a single word. “Young Master Tsuu at work…”

“I wouldn’t have to do work at midnight if you hadn’t pulled this, you know,” Tsukasa sighed. He crossed his arms. “Why are you here anyway? It’s late – aren’t your parents worried?”

“No, no, it’s okay! They know sometimes the aliens call,” Leo hummed happily, as if that was perfectly acceptable.

Tsukasa’s brow furrowed. “But you’re not here to see the aliens?”

“Mmm, no, that’s true! I don’t think I am.” Leo appeared thoughtful for one second, became animated and fixated on Tsukasa the next. “I’m here to see you!”

Still terribly vague but – well, at least it was confirmed that Leo had consciously decided to find his way here instead of letting his feet take him wherever. Tsukasa sighed, gesturing for them to leave the conference room. There was likely tea and biscuits waiting for them now, prepared by the maids.

“Well, let’s not stay up too late, Leader. It’s my first day of my third year tomorrow?”

  

* * *

 

“You have a Suite?” Tsukasa blinked, amazed. Given the fact that Leo had been honored this evening, he shouldn’t have expected a run of the mill hotel room. However he also wasn’t expecting this.

A spacious room all to himself, complimentary wine set on the table. A king-sized bed with luxury linens, decorated in deep reds and soft golds. All the furnishings expected of affluence – a too large television, gorgeous writing desk, and another door that would certainly bring any visitor to an equally extravagant bathroom.

It’s not that Tsukasa was unfamiliar with this level of luxury – in fact, he, Tori, and Hajime were sharing a similar set-up – but he was unfamiliar with this level of luxury in association with Leo.

Also on the desk, next to the bottle of wine, sat the award that Leo had won that evening. Polished crystal and Leo’s engraved name twinkled gently in the warm light of the room.

Leo himself turned to Tsukasa, grinned as he loosened his tie and immediately shed the suit jacket he’d been roped into. It was a careless movement to deposit it on one of the ornate chairs. “You sound surprised? Wahaha! Should I be offended? I didn’t expect to be honored and insulted in one night!”

Except Tsukasa hadn’t intended to insult this time – not entirely – but he couldn’t help but appreciate the sight of Leo with the backdrop of extravagance and first-class living behind him, as if it suited him.

It almost convinced Tsukasa that Leo could belong in his world.

Tsukasa’s brows knitted together. He shook his head. The words died on his lips.

“Someone has to bring you back down to earth, Leader,” he sighed.

“Mm? But why?” Leo laughed, the sound familiar even if it had been far too long since Tsukasa heard it properly. The redhead rushed to the other end of the room where the gorgeous curtains rested, disrupting them as he grabbed one end and ran, all manic energy, thus revealing an entirely glass wall.

The expanse of the city landscape with all its twinkling lights fell against the background of a night sky, the moon close enough to touch.

Continuing his thought, Leo turned to Tsukasa with a grin. “I’d rather be up here in space! Look at it, Suo! What’s so good about earth when we’re up here, huh?”

The words escaped Tsukasa’s mouth before he could stop them—

“Is that where you were all this time, Leader? Space?”

Leo flinched, the fabric of the curtain crumpling underneath his hand. Apparently he hadn’t been expecting that.

And yet, Tsukasa is so sure that he should’ve. Who had always been among the first to point out Leo’s unfair, ridiculous behavior? This is simply how it went for them – Leo would make a mistake and then Tsukasa would point out the selfishness.

At least up until the selfishness had taken Leo away completely.

“Mm, where I was… Where was I?” Leo frowned. The crazed light had been stolen from his eyes and Tsukasa almost felt guilty. Almost. “That’s so hard to remember—”

“Was I so hard to remember?”

As if he’d been struck, Leo’s head snapped to face Tsukasa, wide eyes and expression pained.

It was different.

Different from the times that Leo had managed to forget Tsukasa’s existence when they first met and different from when Tsukasa’s name managed to escape Leo’s memory after that. There was no excuse of being strangers or of a short period of acquaintance.

Tsukasa had been accepted as one of Leo’s Knights, had sworn fealty to his King, and had still been abandoned – why? Because he took one year longer to graduate than Arashi and Ritsu?

Leo had always been far above him – a genius in far too many things to be fair. And yet Tsukasa had thought in the year that Leo had remained present after his graduation, perhaps that was a sign that he would wait. That he didn’t mind and that he’d wait until the day came that he and Tsukasa could walk together.

So Tsukasa chased – he worked until his dance performances rivaled Mitsuru’s, amplified his regal charm until it became his ultimate selling point, led Knights in a way that he thought would make his alumni proud – and he chased and chased.

He’d chased until Leo had gone somewhere that he couldn’t follow.

Why had he been so forsaken?

“… Tsuu,” Leo started, taking a step forward toward him. “Don’t cry.”

Stiffening, Tsukasa raised a hand to his cheeks, feeling the moisture. Surprised, he looked at his own hand, the teardrops clinging onto skin.

Now when had that started?

“You’ve always been pretty,” Leo interrupted his train of thought again, now much closer than he was before. A hand rose to Tsukasa’s cheek, the back of Leo’s hand brushing away the tear trails. “Even now you’re pretty – prettier? I think that’s because of time and not because of tears – but you really… shouldn’t cry over someone like me.”

Tsukasa looked down at Leo – he’d forgotten how small his Leader really was physically, his presence was always larger than life – and he frowned. Leo hadn’t answered his question.

“ _Don’t flatter yourself_ ,” he sighed, a shaky breath. “I’m not crying over you.”

Leo didn’t looked convinced, his green eyes staring up at Tsukasa.

‘It’s unfair,’ Tsukasa thought, ‘It’s unfair that you’re the one that I’ve been looking for.’

It was unfair that Leo – difficult to follow, irrational, impossible Leo – was looking up at him with those green eyes, biting his lip as if he was uncertain. Almost scared. Like they were standing on the precipice of something, like Tsukasa had nearly thrown himself off the edge of it without him.

But in Leo’s gaze was something broken.

_I haven’t been able to put myself back together yet._

Something guilty.

_I’m sorry that I ran again._

Something so painful that it stole Tsukasa’s breath.

_I wish that I stayed._

Tsukasa wasn’t crying over Leo, had stopped shedding tears over his King some time ago.

‘I’m not crying over you.’ Tsukasa let himself crumble enough for his fingers to cling onto the front of Leo’s dress shirt and his head to rest on Leo’s shoulder. ‘But I might be crying over us.’

 

* * *

 

_before._

They stayed up too late.

Even with the chamomile tea, served with the intent of making them sleepy, they stayed up far too late. If you asked Tsukasa, he wasn’t even entirely sure what they had talked about.

Knights. Chess. Anzu.

Leo’s composing. Tsukasa’s singing.

The stars.

“Are you sure you don’t wish to stay, Leader?” Tsukasa frowned even as he led Leo out to the gardens. He’d entered that way, he said, so it would be pointless to try to bring him out to the front. He’d just be lost all over again. Yet Tsukasa pressed on, “We have plenty of guest rooms already prepared.”

“Mmm, nope!” Leo shook his head, sticking his hands in his pockets as he turned to Tsukasa, smiling brightly in the starlight. “I gotta go home – and I’d feel weird waking up here? What if I don’t remember where I am? And you won’t be there to guide me?”

“It’s not like I can always guide you anyway… and there are servants who could help you?” Tsukasa sighed.

“Nah,” Leo denied again immediately. “This place wouldn’t mean anything to me if you weren’t here.”

Tsukasa was an heir to many things – a noble lineage, a beautiful estate, a rich heritage – but receiving compliments like that from Leo still made him feel unbelievably lucky.

“… Don’t you ever get embarrassed?” he asked with a huff – as if that would cover up the pink on his cheeks. It was dark anyway. There was no way that Leo would notice.

“Not anymore!” Leo chirped again, the string of denials continuing. “Being a King – you can get away with anything? Wahahaha, it’s all just my decree!”

“Is that what it means to be King…”

Leo looked over to Tsukasa then, his green eyes still unnaturally bright, shining like a cat’s.

“Mmm… No to that one too.”

“That’s quite a few negatives, Leader,” Tsukasa sighed. The green grass crunched underneath their feet, a brief gust of wind made him shiver.

Well – the gust and the reminder that now, as the most experienced member of Knights, he would take up that mantle of King for himself soon. Leo had just told him what being a King _wasn’t_ , but was he ready to find out what it truly _was_?

“Being a King is a lot of things,” the composer continued, as if he’d read Tsukasa’s mind. “It’s power and control, definitely, but it’s not like that’s why you actually do it? It’s not like we’re similar to the foolish former Emperor of Yumenosaki or anything. If you ever go down that path, you’ll be in so much trouble? Don’t even think about it!”

Tsukasa thought for a moment about how even now, he terribly admired Eichi-niisama.

He chose not to bring it up.

“Buuuut I know you wouldn’t do that anyway – you were always good at bringing us back in line, right? Sena told me that – and then this past year you did that a lot too,” Leo hummed, a quick evaluation of Tsukasa’s moral character. “So I think… that’ll make you a good King. It’s a heavy crown… the history of Knights is a long one, even back when it wasn’t called Knights, but it’s not like you could ever be the worst King.”

Tsukasa’s brow furrowed as they reached the edge of the garden. “Worst King? Who are you talking about? What did he do?”

Leo didn’t face him – not immediately.

His eyes were focused on the horizon, fixated on the sun peeking over the hills, bringing the first rays of warm, morning light.

There was something hard around the corners of his eyes, something hateful and loathing, something that Tsukasa wanted to snatch away.

But he didn’t get the chance. It was gone as quick as it came.

Perhaps it was just a trick of that morning light.

Leo’s gaze became soft, fond. A sigh escaped him, his shoulders relaxing, though he retained a serene poise about him. There were not many moments where Tsukasa thought of Leo as regal – it was hard when he was just as likely to have marker scribbled across his cheeks or get stuck in his own hoodie – but…

But here at the crack of dawn, an inexplicable expression on Leo’s face, all soft edges and bold lines, he rivaled even the light of the sun.

He lit up Tsukasa’s world. 

“What did he do…” Leo finally breathed out, looking back to Tsukasa with the same unreadable expression. “He did the unforgivable, obviously.

“He ran away.”

Conversely, Leo took a step toward Tsukasa.

“He ran away from everyone and everything that he knew and loved. Then he hid when they tried to find him, lashed out when he was discovered. Even if he managed to protect Knights… he then left them defenseless – isn’t that nonsensical? Insane even.”

A hand reached out, brushing Tsukasa’s hair to the side. The backs of Leo’s fingers lingered on his cheek.

“But you brought him back. You brought back someone you didn’t even know, you just knew he was missing… as if he was still worth something even if he was broken.”

When had Tsukasa leaned in ever so slightly? When had Leo’s face gotten so close to his own?

Unanswered questions – but Tsukasa thought he might have found the answer in Leo’s eyes.

Or perhaps if not there, then his lips.

He wasn’t sure who leaned in first, who closed the gap, but what he was sure of was this:

Kissing Leo Tsukinaga was like having a taste of sunshine itself. Warm, pliant, and sweet. All beautiful rays and illumination.

Their lips moved against one another, tentatively. They stood at the edge of the cliff, not sure if this was the right decision to be made, but they were making it.

At the very least, Leo didn’t look regretful when he pulled away.

He grinned, radiant.

“And maybe I’m biased… but I think that’s why you’ll become a good King, Suou Tsukasa.”

Tsukasa gulped, felt the dryness of his own throat. Finding a lack of words, he leaned forward again, as if kissing Leo just once more would be easier than answering him, than responding to his expectations.

But the other moved away, the warmth of his hand leaving Tsukasa’s cheek, and turned his gaze to the hedge that he’d scaled to enter the compound.

“Mm, it’s late? Or early?” he commented, a grin on his face. Had Tsukasa put that there? The sun gently climbed higher and higher, the sky becoming a mix of colorful hues. They stood in the space between times. “Whoops… Oh well! Sorry, Tsuu.”

“Are you really…?” Tsukasa doubted, finally finding his voice. A brief clearing of his throat. “I suppose... what’s done is done.”

Staying up late – among other things.

“Mm, you’re right! Time for us to keep moving forward,” Leo laughed as he began to walk toward the hedge, still keeping his back to Tsukasa.

“Be safe on your walk home, Leader,” Tsukasa responded. A pause, hesitant. Then, pressing on – “I will see you soon?”

Didn’t they have a few things to talk about?

He understood why it was a bad idea now – they’d already spent the whole night talking. Perhaps it would be safe to let this one rest, tabled for another time.

Leo glanced back then, something mysterious in his eyes. Unreadable.

A flash of a grin, bright and brilliant, followed by a laugh as Leo climbed the rest of the way up the hedge and disappeared over the top.

 

* * *

 

_before._

The news came that Leo had left without a trace again.

Tsukasa thought about how he’d been blinded by that smile, how he’d been so distracted by the butterflies in his stomach, how he’d let his hopes carry him too high to notice that he’d been the only one lifted.

If he’d just paid a bit more attention, would he have found hints?

Warnings in Leo’s lips, danger in his eyes, caution in the exposed pieces of his soul?

It haunted him that he was never entirely sure.

 

* * *

 

A shedding of tears and two broken hearts later, Leo and Tsukasa sat on the hotel bed.

Embarrassed, ashamed, and uncertain, Tsukasa gently nursed the warm cup of tea that Leo had prepared for him. He raised it to his lips, let it mend his scratchy throat, and shut his eyes.

Perhaps when he opened them, this would be solved.

Maybe he wouldn’t have to face Leo again.

(Was that a solution? Or just another problem? Tsukasa thought he’d known – now he didn’t.)

“… I wasn’t in space,” Leo eventually admitted, breaking the silence. His eyes were downcast, fixated on the bedding, his fingers fiddling with the complicated embroidery of the comforter. His lips pursed into a frown, disappointment coloring his tone.

Tsukasa couldn’t bite back a brief huff of a laugh.

He hated it.

“Did you think that I believed you?” he asked quietly, letting it hang in the air between them.

He hated that he was already feeling forgiveness slide into the space that rage had once occupied. Hated that Leo could manage to leave him for almost an entire year, but already begin the repairs to Tsukasa’s heart in a little under an hour.

It’s not that Tsukasa thought that he was an easy person to please – far from it, really – but there was something about Leo.

There had always been something about Leo.

Like the way that now he looked surprised at Tsukasa’s answer, pink coloring his cheeks as his expression turned to that of a petulant 5-year-old. “I said that I was in space! So you could’ve believed me – but well, I just said that I wasn’t, so it’s good that you didn’t?! Ahh, lying is always so hard! That’s why I don’t do it?”

“It’s not like you tell the truth either, you know,” Tsukasa sighed over the rim of his cup.

That managed to get Leo to pause – the heart of the matter coming to light.

Tsukasa wasn’t mad because Leo had lied. Tsukasa wasn’t even mad that Leo had left.

It was the way that Leo had left that had been one of the most frustrating parts: leaving pieces of himself behind, just enough to haunt Tsukasa and stir the ashes of unanswered questions.

Now he was just stalling.

“… You’ve been scared before, right, Tsuu?” Leo’s brow furrowed as he stared down at the blanket again, fixated on the space between them. “Not – Not before a Dreamfes or a test or that sort of scared. A different kind of scared. A make it or break it kind of scared.”

“… Not since we had our Duel against Knights Killers,” Tsukasa lied, sighing as he put the teacup aside.

That had been scary – it had been so much on his shoulders to face off against the genius former leader of Knights – but it wasn't honest to say that had been his last experience with fear.

Not when he was sitting here on this bed, wondering if Leo would be gone again by morning break.

‘I’m always afraid,’ Tsukasa thought bitterly, longingly. ‘I’m always afraid that you won’t be here to stay.’

Nerves curled in his stomach but he listened as Leo continued. “You held yourself well back then – I barely would’ve been able to realize… but I did say that I was blind back then, didn’t I? To make trouble for all of you, to be ready to disband Knights even though I loved you all – what a mess. Fun, but… a mess.

“Mm, but that’s not what I wanted to say – about fear. Fear stems from wanting something too much, right? To want something so much that the alternative, the possibility of it not coming true… to let even something like that tilt the axis of your entire world.”

Leo’s gaze turned soft, contemplative. Even as he spoke of fear and anxiety, he sounded calm.

“What were you scared of? During our Duel?”

Tsukasa frowned. It had felt like he was finally being led to an answer, finally approaching closure, only to be sidetracked again.

He answered anyway. “Losing the place that I belonged.”

His lips parted for a soft sigh, followed by his hand coming up to run through his hair, brushing his bangs back into place. Something about him had been drawn to Knights since the beginning, beckoned by their gallantry and poise in a way that not even fine tempted him. They called themselves shambles of a unit back then, but he hadn’t cared.

An old, worn painting still held majesty.

A broken house could still become a home.

“Sometimes I think – where would I be if I didn’t have Knights? And I can’t find the answer,” Tsukasa answered, truthfully. “I had always been the Rook, until I became the King. But your return… it was the first time that I thought that this place that I’d found could’ve been taken from me. Even when Sena-senpai was on probation, it wasn’t as if Knights itself was going to be put at risk. The Student Council couldn’t do something like that. Only you could.”

Violet eyes flashed up in the warm light, looking at Leo evenly.

“You really laid siege on us – on your own castle, Leader.”

Leo froze. His frantic fingertips playing with the bedding were suddenly brought to a halt.

A whisper, fragile as a butterfly’s wing:

“What did you call me?”

Tsukasa paused and took a moment to inhale. “Leader,” he repeated. “Even if you don’t deserve it right now, because you haven’t led anyone in quite some time.

“… But even so, you are my one and only Leader. I gave chase for as long as I could, too, but—”

“You scare me.”

It was so soft, so sudden, that Tsukasa almost missed it. The words that left Leo’s lips, the wide-eyed gaze that Leo pinned Tsukasa with, the trembling of the former King’s genius fingers.

Tsukasa swallowed quietly, unable to tear his eyes away from Leo’s. Perhaps he had misheard. “… What?”

“You scare me – you really… you really give me a fright, you know,” Leo began, the words flowing out of him like a torrent, as if desperate to get them all out before they were lost forever. “Because you still call me Leader – you still look at me like I’m something worth saving, like I didn’t disappear, like—”

‘Like I love you. Like I even know what love is,’ Tsukasa’s mind completed. His hands balled into fists. ‘I know. I hate it.’

“And that’s… that’s terrifying! That’s worse than any horror movie,” Leo continued. “Because you _know_ , you _already know_ what happened the last time I had something so precious to me. You know because you dealt with the repercussions, you saw the mess that I left behind irresponsibly. So it’s insane, you know—

“It’s insane that you’re still… here,” Leo breathed. Green eyes held a flurry of emotions, a small storm swirling inside of Leo, among them guilt and disbelief. “And I know insane – I know that I do… but you’ve – you’ve always been _here_.”

Something broke in him.

Something broke in Tsukasa, something tense and withered and tired.

Sadness had swallowed his rage, he’d thought. Perhaps what he felt now wasn’t rage – was something more akin to desperation.

“I’ve always _been here_ ,” he spat, contempt coloring his words. “I’ve always been here – ever since the beginning, I’ve always been waiting for you… but you can’t do that. You can’t say that!”

A flash of red obscured his vision as he shifted to face Leo, face him head on. A one-on-one battle, whether Leo had intended this challenge or not.

Leo owed him one last duel.

“You don’t get to say that – as if me being here ever meant anything to you…!” Tsukasa’s voice raised, his throat aggravated by the rawness of his own words. They choked and clawed at him like barbed wire, demanding to be released and delivered to Leo. They waited for too long. “You can’t say things like that – like a place wouldn’t mean anything to you if I wasn’t there—”

Long conversations over tea. A manor garden in the morning light. Serenity.

The words bowled Leo over, or perhaps it was the way that Tsukasa verbally lunged at the jugular, now loomed over him in direct confrontation. Leo fell back to the bed with a surprised noise. Tsukasa followed, refusing to break eye contact as his arms framed around Leo’s head.

“—because you’ve always left before I’ve gotten a chance to chase!” Tsukasa continued, relentless. “Because for some reason… it’s never been enough.

“I’ve never been enough reason for you to stay.”

And here Tsukasa had thought that he was all out of tears.

They were tangled on the bed. Leo was left blinking up at Tsukasa who loomed over him, expression just as lost as Tsukasa felt. Unsure what to do for the fresh droplets of tears that fell on his own cheeks.

Inside Tsukasa, the sorrow swirled with the anger. His emotions intermingled like a tornado, tearing up every last shred of composure that he had left. He was certain that there was no coming back from this.

From underneath him, Leo eventually broke the silence.

“… Is that what you thought?”

Some part of Tsukasa wanted to yell again immediately – he just bared his soul, of course all of that was what he thought—

Leo’s hand reached up to his cheek, cupped his jaw gently. His thumb brushed away the new trails of moisture on his refined face.

“I let you think that?” Leo whispered, mystified. “I let you think that you… weren’t enough and that’s the reason why I—”

“If not that, then _why?_ ” Tsukasa demanded, mouth curling into something ugly.

Green eyes looked up at him – free of tears and Tsukasa thought that was merely another reason to hate Leo – but they were nervous. They were scared. They held every single secret and feeling that Leo normally hid behind a red curtain, letting a mad king rule and overshadow the man behind the throne.

Eventually, a small set of eternities later, Leo answered.

“The last time that I had something so important to me, I had to give up pieces of myself to protect it.” Immediately following that statement, there was a flash of panic and he was quick to clarify, “And it’s not that – not that you aren’t worth it, that you wouldn’t be worth enduring that again. It’s never been that.

“But – you deserve more than my pieces.”

Tsukasa choked on his own bitter confessions.

It would be easy to throw that away, to throw this away, to _walk_ away now that he’d received his answer and decide that it wasn’t enough, it wasn’t able to fill the void that Leo had left for nearly a year but—

He saw it.

He saw the truth in Leo’s gaze. Even from underneath Tsukasa, Leo looked up at him as if he retained all the answers – as if he was still hoping against hope that there would be some chance for acceptance.

Tsukasa knew nothing of love.

But he knew that for years, that’s how he’d looked at Leo.

(Still looked at Leo?)

The Mad King continued to play Tsukasa like a fiddle, plucked as his strings and made him sing their sad, sad tale.

Answers eluded them both. Tsukasa searched and searched, tried to find them in Leo’s eyes, as if it was locked away somewhere in his soul, a safe that held the elusive plan on how to best proceed. In the end, Tsukasa found no answer in Leo’s eyes but—

Perhaps on his lips.

Leo stiffened at the kiss; a small gasp parted his lips and Tsukasa was too much of an opportunist to let the chance disappear. He deepened the kiss, tangling his fingers into Leo’s hair. Though Tsukasa’s eyes were closed, he could imagine the expression on his Leader’s face. Surprise? Disgust? Or—

Fingers cupped Tsukasa’s face, uncertain at first before settling there. Leo sighed next, a soft exhale as his body relaxed against the bed and his fingers curled around the back of Tsukasa’s neck – wanting and possessive. Their lips moved together in harmony then, a yearlong symphony finally breaking its silence.

Tsukasa felt his every nerve hum in tune. He didn’t want to admit it but—

He’d been waiting for this.

When he pulled away, his breathing was already gently affected. His mind ran in a haze as he rested his forehead on Leo’s, stared into dilated green eyes and admired the bloom of red on Leo’s cheeks.

“I don’t forgive you,” he sighed. There was still collected moisture at the corners of his eyes. It was too soon for that. Even as he felt the pieces of his heart realigning, even as he felt the thrumming in his bones that ached for Leo’s presence finally quieting.

Yet Leo didn’t look surprised. Didn’t look hurt. “I don’t blame you,” he breathed, his chest rising and falling with the motion.

Tsukasa thought it unfair – if Leo had taken offense, if he’d tried to shift the blame, this could be as good as over. It would have been reason for Tsukasa to stay away and yet—

Leo unfailingly stood by his mess – agreed that hurting Tsukasa was one of the worst decisions he’d made.

Even if Tsukasa didn’t feel forgiveness, could he be blamed for feeling affection?

Fondness for his terrible, amazing mad king?

Softly, under his breath, Tsukasa wondered out loud, “ _Isn’t this unfair?_ ” The words gently rested in the space between them, where their breath intermingled and their noses nearly brushed. “I always told myself that I hated you – like before our Duel. It’s easier to be angry, after all.”

“… are you still angry?” Leo tested him, voice level. There was a trace of fear, amidst the curiosity and concern. “I don’t want you to feel rage – I’d rather you forget me than that.”

“But that’s the difference between you and me, Leader,” Tsukasa sighed, closing his eyes. “I’ll never forget you. No matter how hard I tried to already. I think I was angrier with that than anything else… back in my first year, the idea that you could leave just as quickly as you came even though I worked so hard to find you.

“And now, the idea that even if you leave my side, you’ll never leave my mind.”

(Some people would call that love.)

Tsukasa opened his eyes, took in the bewildered and surprised and cautiously delighted expression on Leo’s face.

“… I didn’t forget you,” he whispered between them, pausing and hesitating for only a millisecond before he leaned up the rest of the way again, pressing his lips to Tsukasa’s for only the briefest of kisses. “I didn’t.”

He hesitated again, his eyes darting to the side. A breath.

“… Thank you for not forgetting me.”

Tsukasa frowned. “ _Imbecile._ ”

“Huh?” Leo blinked, snapped out of his melancholy reverie. His brows knitted together in confusion, stared up at Tsukasa in disbelief. “I—I said thank you and you insult me? That didn’t sound like a ‘You’re welcome’ at all? Tsuu…?!”

“I did and I stand by it,” Tsukasa mirrored the expression on Leo’s face, disbelief settling on his features. “You said that you – you didn’t forget me, right? So… it would be stupid for you to ever assume that I would be doing less than you.”

The tension between them shattered.

When Leo started laughing, Tsukasa realized that he hadn’t properly heard the sound in years.

Different from the stage performance laugh that had rung in his ears earlier at the award ceremony, this laugh did not stem from arrogance or pride but from pure joy. Unabashed amusement.

The gaze that settled on Tsukasa was so warm that he wondered if he would be burned by it.

“You’re right. You’re always doing so many amazing things, Tsuu, I can’t expect anything else except for you to go above and beyond. I love that about you,” Leo sighed, traces of pride laced in his voice. “It’s no good that I missed out on your accomplishments… I thought you’d be so mad you wouldn’t even want to see me – and that… that, I think, would have been the end of it – if I heard that from you. Out of everyone, it’d kill me the most if I heard it from you.

“Maybe that’s why I would want you to forget me before you hate me. In the end, I’m still really selfish.”

The loneliness in Leo’s words made Tsukasa’s heart ache. Even if he was the one who chose to leave, Tsukasa could understand the fear of coming back.

What if everything was different upon his return? What if it wasn’t?

Yet even so, Tsukasa knew one thing that was unshakeable and stubbornly the same.

“… that’s not how I feel,” Tsukasa confirmed again quietly. “It would be too easy if all I felt was anger, wouldn’t it? There is some of that still… but I don’t hate you. And even though I – I couldn’t stand chasing anymore, couldn’t rationalize it… I was always waiting. I am a Knight who swears fealty to only one King.”

So even if the mountains crumbled into rubble, even if his voice grew so weak that he could no longer call out, even if his sword rusted and broke – he would always be waiting.

It looked like that was finally starting to dawn on Leo.

His gaze turned to one of fond disbelief; his hand rested on Tsukasa’s jaw, brushing his thumb against his cheek.

“I wonder what I did that made the gods decide to give me you.”

Tsukasa found himself smiling, leaning into Leo’s touch subconsciously. “Probably something awful.”

Another brief laugh escaped Leo, but the warmth did not leave his gaze. With the decorum of a king, diminished only by the fact that he was left waiting and wanting beneath his knight, he nodded. “Probably.”

Something curled uncomfortably in Tsukasa’s chest, fondness mixed with a nostalgic ache.

There was something about Leo’s laugh that could make Tsukasa think, ‘If I do not kiss him now then I will surely perish.’

Pressing their lips together just once more sounded like the correct course of action, given that thought.

Yet as Leo leaned up for the kiss, let his eyelids slide shut, was too eager for his mouth to meet Tsukasa’s again, that was when Tsukasa realized the fatal flaw in his plan.

There was no way that he could stop at just one.

 

* * *

 

 _before._  

“Really – you’re graduating tomorrow and you’re still lying on the floor? Just don’t do this before you go to the ceremony tomorrow? It would be unacceptable for you to graduate with dirt all over you!” Tsukasa complained, setting his hands on his hips even as Tsukasa was stretched out in Knights’ practice room without a care in the world.

“I’m at home so I can do whatever I want!” Leo answered easily, stretching out even more and probably getting dust all over his jacket. Tsukasa winced at the thought.

Pulling aside a pillow that had likely been discarded by Ritsu earlier, Tsukasa took a seat next to his Leader.

Leo was scribbling through pages of blank music sheets – ones that Tsukasa had begun to carry to accommodate his eccentricities – and… it felt like any other day.

Perhaps that’s what was so dangerous about it.

If Tsukasa wasn’t careful, he might not remember this day.

The last day that Leo would be a 3rd year of Yumenosaki Academy. The last day that the two of them could be considered members of the same unit. The last day that Leo would be the King of Knights.

‘I can’t let that happen.’ His brow furrowed and his mouth craved something sweet as the tension continued to swirl in his stomach, as it set in his shoulders. ‘I can’t let this day pass like any other.’

His gaze fell on Leo again, even as he did nothing but continue to scribble notes on paper.

It was foolish, he knew. It was something that he didn’t understand. It would be too immature to call it something like love when Tsukasa couldn’t possibly feel a word as lofty and heavy as that – could he? – but it was still something that he felt clawing its way out of his throat more and more each day. It needed to escape.

It needed to reach Leo.

He needed to tell him—

Leo stared at him – had been staring at him? How had Tsukasa not noticed that? “Is something on your mind, Suo?”

“Ah?” Tsukasa questioned lamely.

Somebody help him.

“You’re being quiet?” Leo frowned as his head tilted to one side, hair catching the rays of sun that came softly through the window. “Normally you would keep going like ‘You share this home with everyone else! Be more considerate! Your image is going to be ruined! Insert English here!!’”

“… I don’t sound like that?” Tsukasa frowned petulantly.

“You do! It’s okay if you don’t realize, I don’t think Sena knows what he sounds like either. He always tells me my impressions are bad, wahaha! But between you and me, I have a good eye and a good sense for things?” Leo hummed, spouting lies as if they were nothing. “And you’re being reeeaaally quiet today? What happened? Are you tired? Were you visited by aliens last night?”

“ _Just stop_ ,” Tsukasa interrupted whatever other suggestions Leo might’ve had before they could even leave his lips. “Don’t be stupid!”

“Ah, that’s more like it!” Leo grinned, shifting so he was sitting up and giving Tsukasa his full attention. Now that the spotlight was on him, Tsukasa wasn’t sure if he wanted it. “So? What’s up?”

“Nothing’s up…” Tsukasa continued cautiously. “It’s just – don’t you realize you’re graduating tomorrow, Leader? Isn’t that rather momentous? Should you not care more?”

Upon re-evaluation – which happened about .2 seconds after the words left his mouth – he was a little blunt.

He was trying to get better at that.

Not that Leo seemed to care, a laugh escaping him as he smiled up at Tsukasa, all toothy and unashamed. “I care! I care a lot? Mm, it’s what I came back here for, kinda? Between Knights and being able to graduate with Sena… Those are the two big things, I think! Maybe there was three – but if there was a third and I’ve forgotten it, hopefully it isn’t that important?

“So it’s super important to me… but it’s not like it’ll change anything?”

Tsukasa paused.

“It won’t?”

Understanding eluded Tsukasa. They were idols. Graduating would change everything, would force Knights to readjust to accommodate the empty spot on the throne, would mean that one of these days Leo and Izumi might be featured on billboards and stages and never have their affiliation to their unit mentioned.

Were those ties not being severed as of tomorrow?

“Nope, not even a little bit! Wahahaha, you look really confused?! What happened, Suo, did you think that the whole world would shift? That would be really dizzying? What a bad scenario!” Leo laughed, his hand coming up to tap Tsukasa’s nose.

“What? No, shut up—” Tsukasa grumbled again, his hand coming up to brush away Leo’s hand.

To his surprise, the other merely caught Tsukasa’s hand in his own. Even from his place on the floor, it was simple. After all, once Leo had sat up, Tsukasa had leaned forward even at the risk of his posture to meet him, to be closer to his King.

That was the power that Leo exerted over his space – over his knight.

“Nothing’s going to change,” Leo reassured. “I get it. I promise. I won’t be going anywhere – well, unless the aliens come back for me, I guess – but aside from that… even if I’m not King or Ou-sama anymore… a part of me will always be with Knights. And I’ll try to make sure the whole of me is around too.”

The promise was punctuated with a reassuring squeeze, the warmth of Leo’s hand tightening around Tsukasa’s.

It was this sort of thing – this type of sudden, quick, rash behavior – that managed to make Tsukasa’s insides feel like putty sometimes. His chest ached with how full it felt.

Courage commandeered Tsukasa’s heart. Recklessness encouraged him to turn his hand in Leo’s hold, switching their position so his fingers carefully curled around Leo’s own. Guiding Leo’s hand up to his lips, Tsukasa pressed a kiss to the back of it.

Tsukasa had a pledge of his own: “Even if you leave this place, you will always be my King… my Leader. Do not forget.”

The words were not the exact ones that he wanted to say, had transformed into something else by the time they left his lips. Yet for some reason, they felt all the more fitting.

His shoulders eased, relaxed as a weight left him. Looking up, Tsukasa risked making eye contact with Leo even as his heart hammered in his chest.

“Please remember me hereafter.”

Mirth danced in Leo’s bright eyes, the space between him and Tsukasa filled with electricity. Leaning in more, he spoke excitedly, breaking the regal tone that Tsukasa had set.

“Suo, I’m going to let you in on the secret. Are you ready?”

Whether Tsukasa was or not, Leo continued. Typical.

“There’s a big world outside these walls – and there’s so much music to be found in that world. To be made in that world. They might even be waiting for me, wahahaha! And I’m going to step out there a little early, I’ll be scoping out the lands like a proper King, won’t you be proud of me? But anyway! I’ll be out there… and I’ll have everything ready for us.

“For Sena, for Naru, for Rittsu, for you, for me…

“There’s a big world out there,” he repeated again for emphasis. Then added, elated. “And we’re going to conquer that too. The reach of Knights will extend far past this place, even if it might not be called Knights by the time we get out there. But the name doesn’t matter as long as it’s us. We have all the pieces to make it so and all Sena and I are doing is going ahead a little bit but – if it’s all of us, then we can do it.

“I promise,” Leo hummed, grinning wide, “I’ll be waiting.”

Tsukasa sat there, stunned and holding Leo’s hand in his. His heart beat like a hummingbird in his chest and he was certain that his face had warmed into something rosy and soft in the span of Leo’s rant.

He swallowed quietly.

“Leader, I—”

“Helloooo! Sorry we’re late, there were free cake samples at the— Oohh sorry again, are we interrupting? How embarrassing!”

Yet Arashi didn’t seem to take that as a sign to actually retreat. Too late probably, considering the fact that Izumi was already peering over his shoulder.

“What are you two doing? Are you being gross? This isn’t the space for that? How annoying!”

The interruption managed to get Leo to laugh – cackle almost, really. He threw his head back and had his hand escape from Tsukasa’s, standing abruptly to meet the other Knights as the entrance. “You’re really the same as always aren’t you, Sena? Pretty face, awful mouth! That’s okay, I still love you…!”

And just like that, the moment was gone.

Still, Leo at least looked over his shoulder back at Tsukasa and grinned. “Remember! We’ll conquer the world!”

(“We will?” Ritsu yawned sleepily, rubbing his eye. “That sounds like a lot of work.”)

Tsukasa blinked once, twice.

Perhaps it was a trick of the light but he could’ve sworn that Leo’s eyes had said something else too. Something like — _And I’d let you conquer me too._

 

* * *

 

 

Tsukasa was drunk.

He felt it in the way that the temperature was climbing, the way that his head was already beginning to swim in a haze, and every single part of his body felt loose and coiled tightly all at once.

Surely, this was what feeling drunk was like.

Even as the miniature fridge in Leo’s suite was left untouched, even as the wine bottle had not budged a single inch from its desk, even as Tsukasa did not have a drop of alcohol that night—

He assumed that it didn’t matter. The taste of it wouldn’t compare to Leo anyway.

Dress shirts were discarded on the floor, Tsukasa’s blazer and Leo’s tie along with them. The composer’s fingers worked at Tsukasa’s belt even now, every touch and stray brush making electricity run up Tsukasa’s spine, returned in full cycle with every scrape of his teeth against Leo’s neck instead of a kiss. Too much teasing would result in a mark that would surely be spotted by the press the next morning, inspire a lot of talk and certainly let the entire world know that Leo Tsukinaga had been claimed by someone.

Tsukasa had to remind himself that it was a bad idea, not a good one.

This entire thing was enough of a bad idea anyway, probably starting from when he’d left Hajime and Tori.

Yet as his belt clattered to the floor with the rest of his clothes, he couldn’t really bring himself to care.

“Hey,” Leo breathed out raggedly, pulling Tsukasa’s attention away from his kisses mapping out the rest of his skin.

Distracted, Tsukasa pushed himself back up off of Leo, put some space between the two of them. Was Leo really going to be the voice of reason between the two of them here?

Leo smirked.

Absolutely not.

( _Figures._ )

Tsukasa knew that he was not under Leo’s thumb anymore, as if he ever truly had been. He had become a King in his own right. He had inherited Knights. He had risen to the throne. Even if he was in the presence of his Leader and King, Tsukasa wasn’t deluded to think that he was beneath Leo this entire time.

Yet two seconds was all it took—

Leo’s bright eyes shining in challenge even in the dim light of the room. A breath of an age-old affectionate nickname – “Tsuu”. His hand reaching out, beckoning.

– and two seconds was all it took for Tsukasa to crumble, meeting his former lord’s command. He leaned down again to close the space between them, press their lips together, and let Leo's hand tangle in his hair.

He knew what Leo wanted.

It didn’t occur to Tsukasa not to give him everything.

If their previous kisses were soft sunshine, warmth and hesitant affection, their current exchange could only be called a supernova. They were flares of heat, curling spirals of desire, and ferocity that belied years of ache and want.

“Is it bad—” Leo gasped after he pulled away from a kiss, cutting himself off to refill his lungs with air.

Tsukasa already didn’t like where this sentence was going.

“Is it bad that I used to think that you were cute?”

Definitely didn’t like where it went at all.

“Leader—” Tsukasa was prepared to interrupt. Faces flushed and tangled up on a hotel bed, he wasn’t sure that’s what he wanted to hear.

“I used to think – like a chick like Sena would say,” Leo pressed forward regardless, chest rising and falling with his breaths. His lips were still terribly red and yet Tsukasa wanted to kiss him quiet again. “But now I—”

His eyes ran down Tsukasa’s half-naked body, toned from years of practice, grown into a gorgeous young man. A gorgeous young man that was still pressed against Leo, just barely above him, violet eyes dark with lust and licking his lips with what could only be glorious purpose.

A strangled noise – almost a whine of frustration – escaped Leo.

The sound of it went straight through Tsukasa like electricity. God, he _ached_.

The city skyline outside provided a backdrop to their bed, the light of the moon illuminating them and providing just enough exposure for them to learn about each other all over again.

Even with a year’s disappearance between the two of them, there was no denial that Leo and Tsukasa knew each other, understood each other, possessed a connection that was nigh unbreakable.

Learning about each other’s bodies was something entirely different.

Tsukasa had set about deciding that every inch of Leo’s skin needed to be mapped with his mouth. Leo’s fingers tangled in Tsukasa’s hair and pressed into the skin of his shoulder all at once, tapping at the staccato pace of his breath and shudders. They both returned to kisses every few minutes, the messy meeting of mouths and teeth and tongues that they never managed to indulge in before.

And there was so much to indulge in.

Leo clutched onto his shattered pieces of control in Tsukasa’s lap as the other’s fingers entered him; in, out, _in_. The moan into Tsukasa’s mouth sounded like a melody of its own, the answering tempo of Leo’s hips and almost painful grip in Tsukasa’s hair the signs of Leo’s own growing crescendo of pleasure.

Like call and response, Leo’s fingers curled around Tsukasa’s length, prompting gasps into their shared kiss and the lifting of his hips to hastily chase his own mounting desire.

There had been a point where Leo had asked what’s in a home – was it a person, a place, or a thing? Was it a feeling?

Hovering over Leo again, the other’s back pressed to the bed and arms curled around Tsukasa’s shoulders as if he’d never let him get away again, Tsukasa thought that perhaps he’d found the answer.

Even as he lost himself in the heat inside of Leo, pressed in and muffled a groan into the other’s shoulder.

‘If a home can be a person, then I think you are mine,’ he thought even as he listened to Leo’s labored breathing in his ear, counted the paces in between their heartbeats.

Leo shifted and made a soft sound of approval, ever the vocal one, encouraging Tsukasa to continue.

‘You are my lord.’ Tsukasa answered the request of his king, pressed their lips together even as they dipped deeper and deeper into a foreign, uninhibited pleasure. ‘And I, your knight.’

Even as he broke for air, he rested his forehead on Leo’s, didn’t break their gaze. The image of Leo like this, spread out for him and wanting – it would surely be seared into the back of Tsukasa’s eyelids.

‘Please see me,’ he wished, collecting Leo’s moans into his memory. These sinful noises that escaped his mouth and were heard by Tsukasa and no one else. Tsukasa shifted ever so slightly, searching.

‘See only me.’

When Leo’s fingers in Tsukasa’s hair tightened to the point of a sharp pinprick of pain, the other fingers at his shoulder gripping tightly as if he was the last real thing on this earth, Tsukasa knew that he had found the spot that would drive Leo mad.

He focused on it.

It was the meeting of two equals, two stars, two Kings.

Tsukasa reminded himself of that. It had been years since he answered to Leo. Now he answered to no one.

But he couldn't help but think as he watched the gentle arch of Leo’s back as he lifted off the bed, the way his mouth turned a gasp into a grin, the unbearable heat as they both reached their climax in swift, desperate thrusts—

‘It’s like you were made to rule me.’

 

* * *

 

“Mm? Where are you going?”

The words were half-muffled into the pillow, as Leo couldn’t quite bring himself to lift his head from it. Apparently he was too exhausted and blissed out to muster up the willpower.

Tsukasa made sure to school his expression into something neutral, to mask the beginnings of guilt that were already starting to curl uncomfortably in his heart.

“My room?”

“Huuuuuh? Why?” Leo sounded openly grouchy about it now and Tsukasa didn’t have to turn around, didn’t have to pause in his collection of his clothes to imagine the frown that was beginning to curl Leo’s mouth downward. “Is this not comfortable enough for you? Are you used to even _bigger_ beds or something?”

Tsukasa honestly had to wonder out loud, “What do you think is bigger than a king-sized bed?”

A beat.

“A _super_ king-sized bed—”

“Why did I ask?”

“Well why are you leaving? I had that question first.” Leo always knew how to argue like a petulant child. There was the sound of rustling sheets and Tsukasa’s self-control cracked. He glanced back over his shoulder.

It was unfair.

It was unfair how the sheets pooled around Leo’s waist now, the rest of his bare skin softly kissed by the moonlight just as Tsukasa had traced patterns on it with his mouth. He yawned, ran a hand through his hair, and effortlessly looked exactly like home, inviting and warm. Sleep accumulated in the corners of Leo’s eyes, made him soft around the edges and slower in a way that tempted Tsukasa to hold him forever.

“I just… need to go,” he answered weakly even as he failed to button up his shirt any further. He’d just barely managed to even slip his boxers back on before Leo had caught him.

Another pause settled before Leo raised a brow.

“Was it bad for you? Because for me it was—”

“N-No, that’s not—” Tsukasa denied before he realized that he’d cut Leo off, raising both eyebrows in surprise. “Wait, you were saying?”

(Smooth, Suou. Super smooth.)

Leo chuckled softly even as he gave up on trying to run his fingers through his mussed sex hair. “It was good, Tsuu.”

A sigh escaped Tsukasa – relieved. It’s not like he had a lot of experiences to compare it with, but overall he thought that this was pretty much at the top of his list.

(Well, the only awkward part of the night had been when Leo had sent Tsukasa to retrieve a small bottle of lube from his suitcase and there was zero opportunity for Tsukasa to hide the look of betrayal that slipped across his features.

To which Leo had only responded with a quizzical expression.

“Wait, are you jealous? Is that what that look means? You know I don’t need a partner to be able to enjoy myself, right?”

Leave it to Leo to talk about something so risqué so liberally.

At least in the moment it had been just the right amount of blunt to immediately soothe any of Tsukasa’s ruffled feathers and… well, maybe the mental image of it was enough to convince him that it was a far more pressing matter to kiss Leo again anyway.)

“So,” Leo opened up again, sleep apparently managing to slow his brain enough that he didn’t bounce off the walls in his distraction. Of course it didn’t manage to work in Tsukasa’s favor. “Why are you getting dressed again? Why are you leaving in the middle of the night like you’re ashamed? Mm, is this what guilt looks like? It’s kind of cliché?”

Tsukasa had never been so quick to climb back into a bed, sitting next to Leo immediately and reaching out to cup his cheek.

“I’m not ashamed – and I don’t regret anything either,” he clarified quickly.

His words eased some of the anxiety that rimmed Leo’s eyes – which Tsukasa hadn’t even noticed until he’d moved to sit closer. A mix between a scoff and a laugh escaped him. “For someone who talks a lot about refinement and grace, you’re pretty clumsy, Tsuu….”

“I didn’t realize! Don’t be so merciless,” Tsukasa whined as a retort for a second before leaning over to press his lips to Leo’s forehead. “No, that’s not it at all. I just…”

For once, Leo was quiet. Tsukasa wondered how this conversation would go if he was more awake. Would it be harder or easier?

Well, Leo was apparently just awake enough to take advantage of the close proximity and lean forward so that he could rest his head on Tsukasa’s chest.

It was probably to keep him pinned there. What a dirty tactic. Apparently a year apart hadn’t taken away any of Leo’s tricks.

Tsukasa sighed. “I don’t think I could handle waking up alone in the morning.”

So it would be better to be the first to leave instead of getting left behind – even if it was selfish.

Let him try one of Leo’s tactics.

It wouldn’t have solved anything, he knew – but anxiety nipping at his heels prompted him into action, even if that action was rather stupid. Couldn’t he be stupid for once?

Leo was silent and Tsukasa half-wondered if he’d fallen asleep. Then there was a gentle hum and he moved to run his hand across Tsukasa’s chest and up, easing the unbuttoned dress shirt off his shoulders.

“You won’t,” Leo spoke simply, truthfully. Leaned up and pressed his lips against Tsukasa’s briefly. “Because I get it. And you don’t have to say the rest, because I’ll be here.”

Here in this too big hotel room with an open view of the city skyline but more importantly—

_This place wouldn’t mean anything to me if you weren’t here._

—here with Tsukasa.

Though the sky outside was still dark, Tsukasa thought that he got a glimpse of the rising sun in Leo’s eyes.

Leaving no other room for discussion, Leo moved the sheets aside so that Tsukasa could settle underneath them again and tucked himself easily beneath Tsukasa’s arm. There was far too much room in the bed and yet they remained close together, as if even an inch of space wasn’t acceptable.

It felt a little simple, Tsukasa thought, a little too effortless considering the fact that there was still so much between them that needed to be unpacked.

But he thought that the way that his fingers ran through Leo’s hair automatically, and the way that Leo practically purred nonsensically as he burrowed in closer—that was pretty effortless too.

And as Leo dipped off into sleep first, as Tsukasa listened to his breathing evening out, he thought about this giant, legendary, award-winning figure in a compact body – his lord, his leader, his newly found lover – finally pausing to rest. 

“It’s really unfair…” Tsukasa sighed again, soft enough that it wouldn’t wake Leo. It was fine – let this be Tsukasa’s little secret. “You really just do as you please. It’s like you have your own gravity… How could I have done anything but fall into it?”

 

* * *

 

When Tsukasa awoke in the morning, he was not alone. There were plenty of things that confirmed this for him.

The gentle humming emanating from Leo’s throat pulled him away from his dreams and confirmed that his leader had not gone too far. Tsukasa felt his sleepy consciousness follow the trail of notes, made him turn toward the sound of it. Then, the answering and immediate press of Leo’s lips against his, the motion quick and eager. It was dangerously easy how they’d fallen into this pattern of affection and Tsukasa was caught wondering how he’d ever gone without.

Of course, the kiss stopped a different sensation – Leo’s hand paused, marker in hand, from where it had been—

Drawing on Tsukasa’s back?

Brow furrowing, Tsukasa found himself pulled from the pleasantly soft and syrupy sweet reverie of the morning.

“What?”

“I said good morning uchuu!” Leo chirped back happily, far too pleased with himself.

Tsukasa groaned. He turned, moving to press his face back into the softness of the pillow, valiantly trying to ignore Leo’s nonsense so early in the morning.

It was hard considering the fact that – as if he hadn’t been interrupted at all – Leo proceeded to continue his drawing on Tsukasa’s skin, the cool ink of the marker contrasting with the warmth of his canvas. It made him shiver and shudder yet Leo continued on, humming absent-mindedly as he lined out perfect staffs and drew out his sharps and flats and dipped lower down Tsukasa’s spine—

When Tsukasa turned his head back to glare at him, Leo was grinning a mile wide.

Revenge was necessary.

Flipping over was easy; wrestling Leo down was harder, the other cackling and flailing wildly just to make Tsukasa’s life difficult.

Tsukasa definitely didn’t wake up alone this morning – he never had this much fun or had reason to laugh when he woke up alone. Yet now he found himself snorting despite the irritation dwelling in the back of his mind, unable to stay too angry as Leo laughed unrestrained underneath him.

The ink dried on Tsukasa’s skin, running down one side of his back like a melodic tattoo, like a story that was dying to be told.

“Wait, wait! I didn’t finish? Or title it!” Leo smirked up at Tsukasa, eyes manic and playful even in the morning light. “Let me have this inspiration, Tsuu…!”

“You can have it somewhere else – like on paper!” Tsukasa sighed. “What would you even title it? ‘An Ode to Annoying Defenseless Suou Tsukasa in the Morn?’”

“And you say I’m bad at naming things…” Leo sniped. He stopped his tossing and turning now, letting Tsukasa pin him again, his hair wild and splayed beneath him. Easygoing confidence radiated from him, a relaxed air that made it impossible for awkwardness or uncertainty to permeate the space between them.

How could one man manage to be so beautiful and powerful?

It was abundantly unfair how badly it made Tsukasa want to kiss him – and Tsukasa was only a mortal man, and so he did.

“I think the title would be,” Leo spoke messily in between their kisses, murmured half against Tsukasa’s lips, “something else. Something more – honest? Like – ‘Tsuu’s Heartbeat Set the Tempo.’” A breath, a second where Leo’s mouth chased after his partner’s, and then a confession. “Or… ‘A Song About Missing You.’”

Close as they were, Tsukasa was certain that Leo felt the ironic uptick in his heartbeat in the next moment, the surprised intake of air as he felt the wind get knocked out of his lungs all over again.

Pausing their kisses, Tsukasa was left staring into the eyes of his king. Honesty swam in the green of them, with hints of hesitation – anxiety. As if what he had said might not have been the right thing or was too raw or too honest for the time.

Closing his eyes, Tsukasa let his forehead rest on Leo’s, close enough for their breaths to intermingle in the space between them.

In his pause, he felt the beating of Leo’s heart against his own.

“… I missed you too,” he whispered, a secret for Leo’s ears only.

When he had been alone, it was too overwhelming to admit. Missing Leo would be accepting defeat, succumbing to weakness and drawing attention to his absence and the sheer fact that Tsukasa needed him. When it had just been him, Tsukasa could never admit that he missed Leo.

But here they were, in the honey glow of the morning, drawn together again.

With the assurance that Leo would not run again, that he wouldn’t leave, Tsukasa could accept that there had been a time where he missed Leo. More importantly, that time was now over.

Violet eyes opened, finding warmth and sadness and sweetness in Leo’s answering gaze.

‘We’re not alright yet,’ Tsukasa thought with a sigh as he sat up, knowing that they would still have plenty to talk about. This was a beginning just as much as it was an ending. ‘But we will be.’

“Hey Tsuu,” Leo piped up as he followed after, sitting up in bed and letting the blankets pool around them. His hand reached out, traced the medley of notes that ran down Tsukasa’s arm. “Thanks.”

“Hm?” Tsukasa paused, adjusting his hair with his free hand, trying to at least maintain some form of decorum. “For what?”

“I think you brought my music back,” Leo hummed as his fingers traced down the marks that were left on his knight. “I’ve been struggling to find it for a really long time? I thought the inspiration left me – I could’ve been ruined…!

“But,” Leo laughed, the stop and go of his sentences like a rickety train. “I’m not. Thanks to you. I appreciate it – I like you, I love you….!”

“Don’t throw around words like that, Leader,” Tsukasa tossed back easily, as if nothing had changed between the two of them in their time apart. As if the words didn’t manage to make something warm blossom in his chest. He didn’t want to think about that yet. “But that’s good… What use would you be if you couldn’t compose?”

“Ow! That was harsh! I think I’m burned?!” Leo exclaimed, eyebrows raised and mouth in the shape of a smile regardless. “Yeah, I guess that’s what you’d think huh… You’re the King now? You can do everything else that I can…!”

A delicate snort escaped Tsukasa then, his head tilting as he looked toward Leo. Carefully, he took Leo’s hand that was tracing down his arm and held it in his.

In what might as well have been a practiced movement now, he lifted his lord’s hand to his lips and kissed the back of it.

Their gazes locked. Tsukasa smiled.

“Am I your equal now, Leo?”

It was cute – the way that Leo jolted in surprise hearing his name from Tsukasa’s lips like that. His expression grew flustered for a moment before he eventually caught on, regained himself, and laughed.

Freeing his hand from Tsukasa’s hold, he reached out and cupped the other’s jaw. Leo hummed.

“I think if there was anyone meant to be my perfect counterpoint, it would be you, Suou Tsukasa.”

With a gentle pull he beckoned the other closer again – close enough to kiss. Then, his arms reached out to wrap around Tsukasa’s neck and pull him the rest of the way in, right into Leo’s gravity.

Even as their mouths met, Leo’s hand continued to trace phantom notes on Tsukasa’s back, over the already inked lines and trailing even further, guided by a symphony only he could hear.

He left marks on Tsukasa that only he could see, that only Tsukasa could feel, and the thought of it made the knight’s heart beat like a drum.

‘I am yours,’ Tsukasa thought as his lips continued to seek Leo’s, trying to pull the music right out of his mouth, ‘I am entirely yours.’

It was a fact, just as true as his name was—

“Suou Tsukasa!! Are you dead?! Did that alien freak kill you? You better not have gone down without a fight – I-I’ll end you if you did…!”

Tsukasa pulled himself off Leo, expression dark and eyes looking to the ceiling as if seeking help.

Because if he was being truly honest with himself, only an act of God could stand to save him from Himemiya Tori when he was worked up into a proper fit.

Leo, kiss drunk and dazed, blinked up at him. Of course, Tsukasa could always count on Leo to ask the important questions, like – “I didn’t know that I put out a serial killer vibe? Whoa! What have you been saying about me, Tsuu?!”

No one could blame Tsukasa for not being very princely in the next second as he flopped back onto the bed, his eyes rolling to catch the sight of the alarm clock. He decided that this was too much to deal with at eleven in the morning.

 

* * *

 

 

Suddenly, putting on his blazer properly and fixing the lapels of it was the most interesting thing and daunting task in the world. Tsukasa focused on slipping an arm through each sleeve, smoothed out any small wrinkles, tugged on the cuffs, and caught his reflection in the mirrors that adorned the hallway walls. Ah, was that a lock of hair out of place? Time to pause and smooth it back.

“Are you going to keep ignoring me?” Tori deadpanned, indignation already beginning to curl into his voice as he crossed his arms and tapped his foot impatiently. “Is it because you already know that you’ve done something _unbelievably, unfathomably stupid_?”

Tsukasa bit down on his tongue before he could petulantly reply with ‘ _You’re_ unbelievably, unfathomably stupid.’

So maybe the Royals of Yumenosaki were a little bit less than mature around each other even now. It was only human to err.

“I’ve done no such thing,” Tsukasa sniffed and replied with enough irritation that it masked his own uncertainty about whether or not it was the truth.

“Really? Because I think that falling into bed with your old leader that you go all dumb for in the first place is up there on your list of bad choices! And that’s a really long list for you!” Tori waved his finger in Tsukasa’s face even as they resumed their pace down the hall. “He’s insane? And irresponsible! Not to mention a bit of a dog. What’s even so good about that guy? He’s—”

“And how many trophies have you been awarded that exist strictly in your own name, Tori?” Tsukasa snapped.

Irritation flashed before the Emperor’s eyes – they both knew the answer was at zero. Both of them were still at zero. In truth they were competing to see who would receive one first.

Still, there was something in the other heir’s eyes that looked questioning, that sought to understand even as they both stepped into the elevator. “It’s not like you to lust over prestige? What, you need some extra glory? Is that how far the Suou have fallen?”

“The day that we fall even half a step will coincide only with Judgment Day,” Tsukasa replied stubbornly.

That said, it’s not like Tori was wrong. Leo winning an award the night before was about as consequential and relevant to his decision (if it could be called that) to stay over as what he had for breakfast two days ago.

“So what is it?” Placing his hands on his hips, Tori looked up at Tsukasa with a furrowed brow. “Tell me!”

The Emperor of Yumenosaki did not stand nearly as tall as his predecessor used to, did not use nearly as much kind language to obscure his cruelties, and was infinitely worse at hiding the moments in which he genuinely felt concern over someone else.

It would be funny how Tsukasa all at once adored and hated Tori except for the fact that this feeling encompassed him _all the time_.

“You know of hierarchy and regimes just as well as I do,” Tsukasa sighed as the elevator carried them to their floor – even higher than Leo’s. “A knight’s loyalty and dedication are forever.”

Tori stared at him. “Are you a moron? You know that’s just your unit theme, right? It’s for marketing? None of that’s real?”

“Just because you’re a demon playing dress up in an angel’s halo for your aesthetic doesn’t mean that the rest of us are so insincere,” Tsukasa quipped back.

“Hey!” Tori scowled, every inch of him emanating royal anger indeed.

Tsukasa only smiled back, a pinch smug.

“You’re so annoying…! King? Please! You’re more meant to be a court jester!” The Emperor grumbled underneath his breath even as they exited the elevator – only to be greeted with the faces of a few surprised fans.

Then, as if they weren’t at each other’s throats mere seconds ago, they signed autographs and took selfies with squealing teenaged girls. The transition was seamless.

Immature teenagers that they were, they were also professionals.

It was only after the fans left, Tsukasa and Tori standing side by side and waving gently with regal smiles that the shorter of the two spoke up again, making up for his lack of height with his boldness as always.

“So that’s all it is?” he asked softer, doting and regal expression not slipping out of place. “A Knight’s fealty to his King? That’s pretty boring.”

“As if it’s so unfamiliar to you? Yuzuru’s going to pick you up in an hour, isn’t he?” Tsukasa sighed, shaking his head as they headed back again to the suite they were assigned. Tori matched him stride for stride, but as always Tsukasa didn’t point out that his own steps were just ever so slightly shorter whenever they walked together. “More than that, what’s wrong with boring? Cliché? Is that not merely a synonym for _classic?_ ”

“Stop showing off,” Tori sighed as he kept his gaze in front of him. When Tsukasa glanced at him, the Emperor’s eyes were clear. “… Just don’t forget what Hajime said? Don’t chase after someone who won’t wait for you.”

A brief tinkle of a piano melody and a vibration in Tsukasa’s pocket interrupted his attention from the conversation. He pulled his phone out of his pocket, eyebrows raising in surprise before his gaze turned fond.

“… Are you worried about that still?” Tsukasa tried valiantly to fight the smile that was curling on his lips and found it useless. “No, I don’t think I have to chase anymore. I think I finally brought him home.”

‘Or maybe I managed to give him one.’

 

**text 11.38 am.**

**from ou-sama.**

wait wait!! when’s graduation?! your last performance?!? when you’re free next?!?? I forgot to ask! I was too caught up in inspiration and then the pink one was so loud the question flew right out of my head! but don’t worry don’t worry I caught it again~ like you caught me? ☆ haha!!

I guess I have interviews and stuff today but do you still live in the same manor? I’ll break in again! er. get lost again! it’ll be ok as long as you find me, right? wahahaha!! ☆

 

* * *

 

“You want me to call you what?” Leo frowned, head tilting in his confusion. “I must’ve heard you wrong, Tsuu.”

“Ou-sama.”

“Try again – I need to make sure my ears aren’t broken!”

“Why won’t you call me Ou-sama?” Tsukasa pouted.

Izumi’s eyes flicked up from his phone to issue a judgmental gaze before they darted back down. “I’m kinkshaming.”

It was probably unexpected for Tsukasa’s face to be able to turn the same shade as his hair but Izumi Sena was known for making some really impossible things into reality. “W-Wait, no! Not like that! Sena-senpai…!!”

“Stoooop fidgeting,” Arashi scolded, terribly fluffy make-up brush in hand, waving it for emphasis in Tsukasa’s face. The powder clouded in the air and made the newfound King sneeze. “Bless you. But _anyway_ , Izumi-chan stop getting underneath Tsukasa-chan’s skin?”

“They’re the ones being gross,” was Izumi’s response, plain and simple like a five-year-old.

Ritsu yawned and rolled over on the futon that was set up on the floor, “As if this is anything new?”

“I don’t know why I invited you all back here…” Tsukasa grumbled even as he pulled out a handkerchief to dab at his nose after another sneeze. His complaint was only met with a small chorus of laughter before everyone went back to doing their separate activities – Leo composing something on a napkin, Arashi working on Tsukasa’s make-up, Ritsu taking a nap, and Izumi’s focus zeroed in on his phone.

It was different, to have all of them gathered in Tsukasa’s backstage dressing room as opposed to the Knights practice room, but something about it still felt terribly familiar. Tsukasa sighed faintly and relaxed in his chair as Arashi moved to switch make-up tools. The surroundings really didn’t matter for them, did they?

These Knights would always fall right back where they belonged.

A knock on the door and a call – “Tsukasa! You have five minutes, so please head to places now!”

“Be there soon, Hajime! Thank you,” Tsukasa hummed as Arashi finished powdering and setting his face, grateful that everyone had volunteered to help tonight. Even Ra*bits were bouncing around the backstage to help manage the stage so that the current embodiment of Knights could focus on this: their final performance.

“Are you ready?” Izumi challenged, his attention torn from his phone now as he pocketed the device. A taunting smirk rested on his lips as he canted his head upward. “It’d be really embarrassing if you choked on your last hurrah, you know. This could be your legacy.”

“Mean as always, Secchan…” Ritsu drawled even as he lifted himself from the futon, then folding it up to carry under his arm, perpetually prepared. “Your legacy might still be the time that you kidnapped—”

“We don’t live in the past!”

“Wahahaha, that’s right!! Sena still hasn’t had felony charges pressed against him? So we’re safe! That’s a blessing from the gods, you know? Or the aliens!” Leo steamrolled into the conversation, throwing himself between Ritsu and Izumi, an arm around each of their shoulders. “Besides! We’re doing great new things now. It’s too soon for us to have legacies… It’s not like we’re going to die?”

“… You’ve really changed your tune,” Izumi sighed from underneath Leo’s hold, irritated but not brushing him off.

“It’s good? Now he doesn’t sound all annoying and old?” Ritsu pointed out.

“You’re the same age? Especially now that you’ve graduated?” Arashi questioned, make-up kit in hand as the group of them walked toward the dressing room door. “How did this even become about Ou-sama again – isn’t this Tsukasa-chan’s special night? Oh, wait, you’re Ou-sama now, aren’t you? Ou-chan, maybe—”

“ _Definitely not that_ ,” Tsukasa interrupted, walking forward with a flick of hand, letting the costume of his cape fall behind him. “It’s nothing of importance – it is not as though I will be Ou-sama for much longer, I suppose.”

“That’s kind of sad? I think you’re Ou-sama forever to your current band of Knights,” Arashi hummed.

“Does that mean in two years the brat will have someone banging on his hotel door to declare their undying love—”

“Huh?” Leo squinted. “That’s not how it happened, Sena. We—”

“That was not an invitation for details about your disgusting love life.”

“I don’t remember why I missed you all…” Ritsu sighed, “You’re so noisy.”

“Why don’t you save your voices to cheer for me?” Tsukasa laughed faintly as they exited into the hallway, already beginning to part. The alumni would take their reserved seats in the audience while Tsukasa would head for the stage for his final performance as a Knight.

And that would be that.

“You’re assuming a lot,” Izumi pointed out – but he took the first initiative to approach Tsukasa. He had to look up ever so slightly now, ever since Tsukasa grew taller, but something about him still seemed so terribly in control. “But I’m here to watch you – and even if you mess up, I guess I can’t just leave you now. So either way, you win, right?”

Tsukasa’s lips eased into a smile despite himself. “You’re awful as always, Sena-senpai.”

There was a flash of amusement in Izumi’s blue eyes – and then he turned away with nothing more than a smirk on his face.

Arashi was immediately next, pulling Tsukasa into a tight, excited hug. “No matter what, I’m really proud of you.”

“… You’ve always been the most encouraging, Narukami-senpai,” Tsukasa relaxed into the hold, brought his arms around to return the hug. “Thank you for your guidance through all these years… even if I did not always say it out loud.”

“You’re going to make me cry…?!” Arashi wailed before pulling back, opting instead for holding Tsukasa’s hands as their gazes locked. Lavender eyes were ever so slightly dewy but unmistakably lovely. “Listen, part of being an older sister means that you don’t have to say it out loud for me to understand… I’m very glad for the person you’ve grown to be.”

Something squeezed Tsukasa’s heart tightly and made him reflexively hold onto Arashi’s hands tighter. “… I’m glad for your help in getting me here and for the person you have always been.”

The fullness of Arashi’s heart reflected in teary eyes and a hand was retracted to cover quivering lips. “Oh, I can’t do this anymore… You win this round, Tsukasa-chan…!”

“Here, here, let me…” Ritsu walked up next even as Tsukasa was recovering from a small bout of laughter, as if that would be enough to obscure the tears welling in his own eyes. “Don’t cry? Your make-up will be messed up and you need those fluids to stay strong through your upcoming battle.”

“Ah… I both understand completely what you mean and fail to comprehend at all, Sakuma-senpai,” Tsukasa sighed. “Though I suppose that is just _business as usual_.”

“You’re right,” Ritsu hummed before regarding Tsukasa with a sleepy gaze. Then, he reached out to pet the top of Tsukasa’s head. “But you’ll just keep doing your own thing… and it’ll work out, just like it always has for you.”

“That’s hardly a type of strategy.” Tsukasa raised an eyebrow. “Is that smart?”

“Well, it works.” Ritsu shrugged noncommittally before pulling his hand back. “You’ve always done things for the good of Knights…”

A tilt of his head and then Ritsu began to wander off, as if he was done. Tsukasa watched him walk off with steady strides, then slow.

“But,” Ritsu paused and glanced back over his shoulder. A lazy smile stretched across his face, his gaze clear. “Suu-chan always helped make Knights a place that I wanted to be. So… it can’t be all bad, right?”

Tsukasa swallowed quietly. “… It would not have been Knights without you either, Sakuma-senpai. Thank you for being part of the family.”

“Family…” Ritsu repeated, as if testing the word on his tongue. “Yeah… I guess this was family too. You saw that sooner than I did, didn’t you, Suu-chan? You always see a lot more than us… Good job.”

Arashi and Izumi looked back at him too, nodding faintly in agreement.

Leo stepped forward.

Then he dipped a little bit, and then using the power from his bended legs, he leapt forward and threw himself at Tsukasa, arms outstretched.

“Leader?!” Tsukasa exclaimed, arms suddenly so very full of Leo. “What…?!”

There was a shake of Leo’s head, stubborn even as he buried his face further into the crook of Tsukasa’s neck. His breath was warm and Tsukasa felt his face turn redder.

“It’s not the end,” Leo muttered, only soft enough for the two of them to hear. “You might get scared for a little bit but – this isn’t going to be the end.”

Then, he unceremoniously stopped his clinging and landed on his feet in front of Tsukasa, looking up at him with eyes full of warmth and affection.

“This is your show, Tsuu. Set the bar high, okay? Show them what we taught you…!” There was a thoughtful pause and Leo’s face crumpled, very obviously wrestling with something before his expression relaxed into a smile. “Heh. Break a leg out there, Suou-sama… Mm, yeah. Ou-sama.”

 

* * *

 

This stage wasn’t the same one as the first stage that Tsukasa performed on in Yumenosaki Academy, but as he performed, watching the twinkling of the lights in the crowd and hearing the roar of their cheers, he felt the same amazed feeling wash over him.

‘They’re here for me,’ he realized. ‘They’re really here for me.’

They had been there for his debut, as the new member of Knights introduced to the crowd, and now they were here for his swan song before he departed the unit entirely.

“Thank you for your attention, please keep your eyes on us!”

The current members of Knights followed along with their script now confidently, adjusting their usual routine to accommodate for it being Tsukasa’s last performance.

“We appreciate you staying with us this long – please be with us again next year.”

The lines of their song – composed by Anzu – were edited just enough to give the tone of finality until Knights would perform again without Tsukasa at their head.

“Even though life brings change, our devotion to you will be eternal.”

As the sole senior graduating this year, the King leaving the throne, Tsukasa was meant to stand in the center of the stage as the farewells were said. The lights began to dim, a spotlight focusing on him.

“Please keep us, your Knights, with you forever.”

All eyes were on him.

Tsukasa raised his hand to cross over his fast-beating heart, felt the hurried pulse of it underneath his palm. His Knights looked to him, each falling to one knee in their final show of fealty. The roar and noise of the crowd crashed over him like a tidal wave as they all recognized this moment – this would be the last time that he would appear before them as their Suou Tsukasa, their Ou-sama, their Rightful King.

‘Thank you’ rested on his lips, on the tip of his tongue, radiated in his gaze as the cameras centered in on him. ‘Thank you for loving me.’

Words tumbled out of Tsukasa’s lips before he could stop them:

“ _My lord_ , I am yours. I love you.”

Screams emanated from the crowd as each person took it as their personal declaration of love from Suou Tsukasa, understood it as one final show of regality and princely affection, and they adored him all the more for it.

The Knights on stage raised their eyes to him and Tsukasa couldn’t meet any of them, knowing the amusement and mirth that danced in each of their gazes.

Even from his place on stage, he could see the reaction from the reserved VIP seating. That was already enough of a test.

Izumi had been so startled that he’d lost grip on his phone, which had in turn smacked Ritsu in the face, not that it stopped either of them from laughing. Ritsu, good sport that he was, apparently was also handing Izumi some bill of money. Of course they placed a bet on this. Arashi was a mix of delighted and petrified, mouth so obviously screaming ‘Oh my goooood’ into the ether. And Leo—

Leo was stunned and Tsukasa couldn’t help but smile. He waited out the shock on Leo’s face, watching the little explosions going off behind his eyes. Then there was the moment where the declaration dawned on him and – Tsukasa wished that he could take that moment, bundle it up, and keep it with him forever.

A grin spilled over Leo’s face like the rising sun and – he was so bright and so beautiful that Tsukasa nearly looked away but he didn’t because he couldn’t back down from this.

(He couldn’t back down like he’d been backing down for months, dodging every time that Leo said “I love you”. He’d played it off like Leo still didn’t mean it, like he was still saying it just as frivolously as always, when every fiber of his being made it clear that he _did_ , made it clear to the world that he’s in love with Suou Tsukasa and—

Tsukasa finally wanted to answer that challenge.)

It was too loud for Tsukasa to hear Leo’s response but he didn’t need to.

In half a second Leo was standing from his seat, immediately running as close as he could to the stage and making the effort to climb the railing before anyone could grab him. Tsukasa could read his lips, could hear Leo’s voice ringing in his head—

“I love you too!! I love you!”

Tsukasa breathed in and nodded ever so minutely as their gazes locked. ‘I know you do. I can’t deny that anymore.’

Maybe this wasn’t the most private way to declare his love, maybe it lacked the intimacy of something classically romantic, maybe it was too loud and too public but—

Leo didn’t look like he minded.

Tsukasa would have opportunities to tell Leo again and again of his love: moments to whisper it against his bare skin in the soft sunlight of the morning, anniversaries to remind him through the years that nothing could tear them apart, songs for the two of them only that would have his adoration written into the very notes.

They would have the chance to say ‘I love you’ a million times over.

And as long as Leo kept looking at Tsukasa like that – like he was made of magic – and Tsukasa knew the same expression was on his face—

He couldn’t see himself getting tired of it.

The chasing was over.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading!! if you would like to chat with me or watch me cry about writing some more, my twitter is @sunwritten!


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